Episode 10

full
Published on:

22nd May 2024

10: From Debating Catholics To Becoming Catholic | Sydney Tanner

This weeks episode features one of West Coast Catholic's marketing team members Sydney. She shares the evolution from her Protestant upbringing to embracing Catholicism. We dive into her journey from being anti-Catholic and spending hours debating Catholics, to her skeptic intrigue of the Catholic faith, all her personal research, the grace God gave her to come to the true faith. Sydney shares her newfound love for Catholic practices like adoration and the Rosary while offering insights for those considering a similar spiritual conversion.

------

Episode Sponsors

Darling and Divine - darlinganddivine.co and use code EVERBE for 20% off your order!

Pieta Paperie - shop.pietapaperie.co and download the FREE Catholic Wedding Stationery Timeline & Checklist here.

My Saint My Hero - mysaintmyhero.com and use code EVERBE15 for 15% off your order!

Crunchi - crunchi.com/mariwagner click the link to get 10% off and use code ADVOCATE10!

------

Follow Along:

Ever Be Podcast Instagram

Mari Wagner Instagram

West Coast Catholic Instagram

Transcript
:

Hey, I'm your host, Mari Wagner, and you're listening to the ever

2

:

be podcast where faith meets lifestyle.

3

:

I'm so excited you're here, whether you're

a new listener or a longtime follower,

4

:

I know there's something here for you.

5

:

Pull up a chair and listen in for

insightful real life conversations

6

:

and actionable steps on how to claim

the full life God created you for.

7

:

If you're a woman desiring to live

a Christ centered life in today's

8

:

modern world, then this is for you.

9

:

Welcome to Ever Be.

10

:

mari---sydney_3_05-03-2024_140354:

Hey everyone, welcome back.

11

:

Happy Wednesday.

12

:

I love that these episodes drop every

Wednesday, middle of the week, because

13

:

it's like a little pick me up, I hope,

for you for your middle of the week.

14

:

Maybe a little dose of

inspiration and motivation as

15

:

you try and finish out the week.

16

:

This episode is going to be really good.

17

:

I think it's going to be really beautiful.

18

:

I have my friends sitting here.

19

:

Sydney on the podcast today, Sydney

is a dear friend and she is a teammate

20

:

of ours on West coast Catholic.

21

:

She is on our marketing team.

22

:

And just as a woman, she

is amazing and inspiring.

23

:

So I know that you are going to

learn so much from her today.

24

:

Thanks.

25

:

I'm excited to be here.

26

:

So Sydney, welcome to Everbe.

27

:

Thank you.

28

:

Why don't you introduce yourself so

our listeners can get to know you more.

29

:

Okay.

30

:

So my name is Sydney Tanner.

31

:

I grew up in Minnesota.

32

:

I'm the oldest of three girls.

33

:

So me and And then my two younger sisters.

34

:

So it was a really fun

household growing up.

35

:

I went to Colorado state.

36

:

So love Colorado, love

skiing, all the things.

37

:

And then now I live in

Dallas, Texas with my husband.

38

:

Um, and I, like Mari said, work on

the West coast Catholic marketing

39

:

team, which has been a dream.

40

:

And then I also own

Darling and Divine Jewelry.

41

:

What's, what's darling and divine?

42

:

Great question.

43

:

So darling and divine

is my jewelry company.

44

:

Our goal is to help emulate

women's natural God given

45

:

beauty through jewelry pieces.

46

:

I love that.

47

:

Um, so not jewelry pieces

that take away, but add.

48

:

to our natural, God given, womb created

beauty, our tagline is uniquely

49

:

designed like you, because each woman

is uniquely designed, and each of

50

:

our pieces are uniquely designed.

51

:

We have Catholic pieces, as well

as just your everyday classic

52

:

pieces, all hypoallergenic, all

non tarnish, and yeah, it's been a

53

:

dream staples that every woman needs.

54

:

Yes.

55

:

Every woman needs, every

woman needs to accessorize.

56

:

Yeah, absolutely.

57

:

Well, thank you for introducing yourself.

58

:

Uh, today's going to be so good.

59

:

We are going to be talking about your

story, your conversion story, and I feel

60

:

like stories like these are always so

inspiring and motivating for all people.

61

:

Like whether it's somebody, um, navigating

conversion or asking questions about

62

:

the faith As well as to people who are

cradle Catholics like me, we were just

63

:

talking about this before the episode

started, but we were like, wow, like

64

:

when you meet a person who converted,

you're always like, what is your story?

65

:

Like, how did you get here?

66

:

And like being a Catholic myself, it's

like, I was just raised in the faith.

67

:

You know, I've come to

love it and know it more.

68

:

The more that I've gotten older

and like actually took time to take

69

:

it as my own and to research and

to learn what the teachings are.

70

:

Yeah.

71

:

But , a lot of the times you notice

that the people that are converts are

72

:

the ones that have like that knowledge

and that passion and that faith.

73

:

Um, so it's so inspiring and I'm

excited to have you share today.

74

:

Thank you.

75

:

Yeah.

76

:

I was telling Marie before that

when you are, you decide you're

77

:

going to become Catholic, you're

converting into the faith.

78

:

People look at you like you are

like some golden bunny, like

79

:

you are like the golden prize.

80

:

Like.

81

:

Like their jaw drops and they're

like, tell me why, why, why would

82

:

you become Catholic, you know?

83

:

Um, and so, yeah, it's a blessing.

84

:

So I guess to understand my conversion

story and many, you have to go to

85

:

how you were raised in the before.

86

:

Um, so I was lucky to be raised Christian.

87

:

I was baptized Lutheran.

88

:

We'd go to church.

89

:

Like it was just like the normal Minnesota

family, I would say that was Christian.

90

:

In high school I started longing for

a deeper relationship with Jesus.

91

:

And so I, went to Hosanna, which

was a non denominational, like mega

92

:

church in the suburbs of Minnesota.

93

:

I went to a small group there and that was

good, but I wasn't like super invested.

94

:

I would say it was like,

Oh, it felt good to go.

95

:

And then I decided to go to Colorado state

for college and I was in young life there.

96

:

, and things just didn't

really pan out there.

97

:

I was approached by Sarah, who

was on staff with Stumo, which

98

:

is a really big, Greek life.

99

:

Student athlete, Christian ministry,

not Catholic, very not Catholic.

100

:

Um, and it was for Greek

life and student athletes.

101

:

So like very lost groups.

102

:

And I was a Gamma Phi

Beta at Colorado State.

103

:

And I loved Stumo.

104

:

Like Stumo was amazing.

105

:

Those were my people

and I was so invested.

106

:

I did their summer program every

summer, nine week discipleship

107

:

school, we went and did beach

evangelizations, like walking up to

108

:

strangers, sharing the gospel with them.

109

:

Wow.

110

:

, and so I was like, So unfair for Jesus,

like loved my relationship with Jesus.

111

:

Would read scripture every

day, prayer every day.

112

:

You grew up Lutheran and was

your relationship with Jesus

113

:

developed as you were growing up?

114

:

Or was it like in college through this

Jumo group that you were like really

115

:

on fire and really close with the Lord?

116

:

I would say for sure college.

117

:

Going to Colorado state.

118

:

I didn't pick it for spiritual reasons.

119

:

You know, like people will go

to like Steubenville because

120

:

they're like, Oh, I'm Catholic.

121

:

I want to like deepen my Catholic faith.

122

:

Um, but I just chose Colorado state.

123

:

Cause I was like, I love skiing.

124

:

I love Colorado.

125

:

Like it's away from Minnesota.

126

:

And Stumo really formed me.

127

:

Like, I am so grateful.

128

:

I had a friend ask, do you regret any of

your college years, forming through Sumo?

129

:

And I was like, Oh my gosh, no, I am so

thankful for Sumo and the way it formed

130

:

me and my passion to share the faith.

131

:

It's not really a pro Catholic community.

132

:

It is like, this is what we teach.

133

:

It's very non denominational,

. Um, which is great.

134

:

Um, but because of that, me

and my friends would go

135

:

debate the sisters on campus.

136

:

There'd be sisters in the plaza and like,

we'd walk up to them and talk to them.

137

:

And then like, there'd be Ram Catholic

students and we'd go and be like, you

138

:

worship idols or you're a worshiper

of Mary, like all these things, right.

139

:

And um, Little did I know,

a year and a half after

140

:

graduating, I'd be Catholic, so.

141

:

And we have our little

Mary statue right here.

142

:

Little Mary statue, yes.

143

:

Wow.

144

:

So when you're saying Stumos, Not pro

catholic would you say like you grew

145

:

up in this not grew up But like you

were formed in this environment in

146

:

college Was it anti catholic were they

speaking out like against the church?

147

:

Like did you have preconceived

notions about the church?

148

:

Yeah, I think growing up a lot of people

around me had negative experiences with

149

:

Catholicism And so that planted that seed

and all these lies and When you have all

150

:

these misconceptions, it's a lot easier

to feed the fire of those misconceptions

151

:

than to pull back the layers of your

heart and realize how much pride there

152

:

is in that and like the humility you need

to step into understanding Catholicism.

153

:

And so I would say it was just

easier to defend the Protestant

154

:

faith than to be like, wait, what?

155

:

Why do they think this , where

are they getting this from?

156

:

Easier to just defend what you know,

rather than like dive into what you're

157

:

debating to try and understand it.

158

:

So often, I mean, like in

debates, in any, in any topic.

159

:

The person is so passionate about their

stance and so defensive that they don't

160

:

even give a second thought to what

the other person's saying, you know?

161

:

And so that's definitely how it was.

162

:

So what were the initial beginnings of

your interest in the Catholic church?

163

:

You know, you didn't really grow up with

any like Catholic community around you.

164

:

What sparked that interest?

165

:

I just started dating a guy And In our

conversations before we had like made it

166

:

official we were dating He told me like

he was like super devout Christian like

167

:

he also was on nominational and I was

like, oh my gosh Like I've met my husband.

168

:

Yeah, like I right away

was like this man is holy.

169

:

This man is gonna push me We're

very aligned in our hobbies

170

:

and the things we care about.

171

:

And, I even remember coming home

and my dad was like, I've never

172

:

seen you this happy before.

173

:

And that was a big testament to like,

okay, I think that Sam is the one for me.

174

:

Mm-Hmm.

175

:

. Um, however, two weeks into a stating,

he sent me a super long voice memo

176

:

and was like, um, I can't deny

what the Lord's doing in my life.

177

:

I'm becoming Catholic.

178

:

I've been discerning this for three years.

179

:

And like I, if that means

that we have to break up.

180

:

Like I will not not make this decision.

181

:

Like I am becoming Catholic.

182

:

Wow.

183

:

Wow.

184

:

He texted you this two weeks into dating

and you hadn't come up in conversation.

185

:

No.

186

:

Wow.

187

:

He, he like thought he even thought

of like not becoming Catholic because

188

:

he was like, I like really like

Sydney, but he was like, I have to

189

:

be obedient to the Lord in this.

190

:

Yeah.

191

:

And so I hear this voice memo, it was

eight minutes long and I'm bawling.

192

:

Okay.

193

:

I am like, they're deceiving you.

194

:

The lies, like they're idol

worshipers, all this stuff.

195

:

Um, I was like, they don't

even know what heaven is.

196

:

Like they, you know, works all this stuff.

197

:

And you're probably also like emotional

because you're like, I really like this.

198

:

This guy's like, I thought this

was going to be my husband.

199

:

And it was like, you're two weeks in.

200

:

So you kind of have those butterflies

and you're like, Oh, I really like you.

201

:

But they don't shoot.

202

:

Like, this is a big deal.

203

:

Yeah.

204

:

Um, and I was just like, Catholic, like

I never envisioned my life going to mass.

205

:

Like what the heck?

206

:

And so I, he, he literally sent

me the voicemail and went to

207

:

bed, which was probably good.

208

:

Like, it was like, I needed

space to like process this

209

:

because I was emotionally unwell.

210

:

And so the next morning I was like, okay.

211

:

Like I couldn't sleep all night.

212

:

I was like, okay, give me a week.

213

:

Let me like really dive into

what I find about Catholicism.

214

:

And at the end of the week, I will let

you know, like if we're going to be

215

:

together and I can support you in this,

or if like this relationship needs to end.

216

:

Wow.

217

:

I just like want to commend you for that.

218

:

Like, that's like.

219

:

A new level of open mindedness to like,

given like the community that you were

220

:

in, how strong you were in your Protestant

faith and how you were like to fit,

221

:

like, like debating the Catholics, you

know, just to even have that moment.

222

:

I think that was probably the Holy Spirit

that gave you the grace to be like, okay,

223

:

I'm actually gonna do the research myself.

224

:

I'm going to see what this is all about

and yeah, see if I can support you.

225

:

So that's, that's beautiful.

226

:

Okay.

227

:

So then what happened?

228

:

Yeah.

229

:

So I think you made a really

good point about the Holy Spirit.

230

:

The Holy Spirit prompts

people's hearts, right.

231

:

To be open to it because

I, we're all prideful.

232

:

And so I didn't like, I don't know why

my heart was more open in the end to

233

:

receive Catholicism than like some of my

friends even like they'll ask questions

234

:

so I was like, give me a week.

235

:

So I'm like, where do I even start?

236

:

So I just make this huge list of my notes.

237

:

I mean like scrolling, scrolling,

scrolling list of questions.

238

:

Wow.

239

:

And I'm like, Why do

Catholics worship Mary?

240

:

Like why, like what, who are the saints?

241

:

Who are these people?

242

:

What is a nun?

243

:

Do they even exist?

244

:

Like, are they, like,

do they speak English?

245

:

Like, I'm like, who are they?

246

:

Like, who is a nun?

247

:

, why would you choose that lifestyle?

248

:

Like, that's crazy because

there's nothing like that.

249

:

And I'm like, why can't

priests get married?

250

:

Why can't they have a family?

251

:

That's so bizarre.

252

:

And so I started

researching and of course.

253

:

Lo and behold, Father

Mike pops up on YouTube.

254

:

That's every answer to every question.

255

:

And I will need to send this to Father

Mike so he can hear this shout out.

256

:

Yeah.

257

:

Oh, he would love it.

258

:

Um, but this whole week I

should preface Sam and I are

259

:

not talking about Catholicism.

260

:

Okay.

261

:

I'm like doing my own independent

research at this point.

262

:

Yep.

263

:

And Father Mike is helping me like,

understand, understand, like he's

264

:

so He's been so blessed by the Lord

for his mission to explain things

265

:

to non Catholics or Catholics.

266

:

In a very simple, like, easy

to digest, yet attractive way.

267

:

Yes, yes.

268

:

So I was actually training for

half marathon at this point.

269

:

So I had many hours of

running during the week.

270

:

So I would just plug his

podcast on and just go.

271

:

And I was just like, I'd have a

question, boom, that topic would pop up.

272

:

Like he has everything, right.

273

:

Which is such a blessing to

those coming into the faith.

274

:

So then I was like, okay, Father

Mike's giving me a lot of peace here.

275

:

Although some of the answers are hard

to understand and hard for me to digest

276

:

because I've been thinking of Christ in

a certain view or the church in a certain

277

:

way, like I do get the Catholic viewpoint.

278

:

Okay.

279

:

But then I was like,

What is a nun, you know?

280

:

So they're abiding together like they

pop up and so I start listening to them

281

:

and I'm like wait like she was a d1 I

think like yeah, it's like sister Miriam.

282

:

Yeah, I was like wait She's so cool Like

these are normal people I remember I

283

:

was at the nail salon and I was like

had my ear pods in I was that girl

284

:

and I was listening and I was like,

how, how is this, how can this be?

285

:

Like, how can she be normal and to none?

286

:

What the heck?

287

:

I was just like, I didn't know

this was a desire of people's

288

:

heart to be a sister, you know?

289

:

Wow.

290

:

So in addition to, My research.

291

:

I also was like I want

to speak to Catholics.

292

:

Okay, I need first hand witness first

hand witness, baby are you in the faith?

293

:

Are you devout?

294

:

So I go on ram Catholic nice, which

is which is like the Catholic version

295

:

of stumo It's like the Newman.

296

:

It's the Newman Center at CSU yeah, cuz I

was like, well I don't know any Catholics.

297

:

So I didn't grow up with

any devout, devout Catholics.

298

:

So I was like, all right, well,

Instagram it is like, I love Instagram.

299

:

So I just DM a couple.

300

:

I DM this girl, Grace.

301

:

She never gets back to me.

302

:

I DM this girl, Kelly.

303

:

She responds overnight and was like,

let's FaceTime tomorrow morning.

304

:

And I was like, Perfect.

305

:

And so I come hot and heavy, ready to

basically pull her out of Catholicism.

306

:

And was this girl a student

or was she a missionary?

307

:

So she was a student, Colorado state.

308

:

She was a Theta and she was

just like tagged in a photo, but

309

:

she's a folks missionary at KU.

310

:

Now she is.

311

:

Yeah.

312

:

So she like amazing.

313

:

Yeah.

314

:

So she knew how to answer my questions

from like a baby, baby perspective.

315

:

Yeah.

316

:

Um, so Kelly and I FaceTime and she

was like, I think just like seeing

317

:

like the Lord's story play out in

this week, but Kelly and I FaceTime

318

:

that first day of my research period.

319

:

And she lays out so beautifully

the church and answers my

320

:

questions with so much grace.

321

:

And I was spicy.

322

:

Okay.

323

:

Like I was like, Kelly, I don't

get this, you know, whatever.

324

:

And you know, come to find out she ends

up being one of my confirmation sponsors.

325

:

Um, She's amazing.

326

:

Later that week, I FaceTime with

Neil, who is Sam's spokesmissionary,

327

:

who is now in seminary.

328

:

He is very wise.

329

:

He has so much theology, like historical

background can help, give an answer

330

:

that's to the tradition, the scripture

and the theology of the church, which

331

:

I needed because I love history.

332

:

And so that was a big piece of

what pulled me into the church.

333

:

At the end of the call was like,

okay, if you can support salmon,,

334

:

do you support salmonists?

335

:

And I was like, yes, I do

support my boyfriend at the time.

336

:

But it's not for me.

337

:

It won't be for me.

338

:

And I even remember calling my parents

and I was like, Sam's becoming Catholic.

339

:

Uh, I support him in

it, but , don't worry.

340

:

It won't be for me., I remember facetiming

Sam after the end of the week and I was

341

:

like, okay, this is still really hard.

342

:

There were so many tears shed that

week, but I can support you in this,

343

:

but it's not going to be for me.

344

:

Yeah.

345

:

But clearly you did become Catholic.

346

:

That's why we're here sharing your story.

347

:

So what were the events or experiences

or like God moments that you had in like

348

:

the years after that, or what you, it

sounds like it was a year and a half

349

:

only, um, that led you to actually

make the decision to become Catholic?

350

:

Yeah.

351

:

So at the end of the

week, when I call Sam.

352

:

He's like, you know, what,

what research did you do?

353

:

Who did you like find?

354

:

And I'm like, there's this

father, my guy, he's phenomenal.

355

:

He's basically sounds like, you

know, your mega church pastor,

356

:

but he's in like priest uniform.

357

:

I'm like, it's not crazy.

358

:

And Sam was like, no way.

359

:

That's the priest at my school.

360

:

So Sam played baseball at

university of Minnesota, Duluth,

361

:

just like such a godsend.

362

:

And I was like blown away.

363

:

I was like, you know, this guy.

364

:

You know, you're buddies with him.

365

:

Uh, and he was like,

yeah, I'll introduce you.

366

:

When you come up and I

was like, Oh my gosh.

367

:

Like all of a sudden I'm

like, insert fangirl moment.

368

:

As I'm sure everybody listening

is fangirling right now.

369

:

Like, did we all know Sydney

was friends with Flo and Mike?

370

:

No, we didn't.

371

:

No, you do.

372

:

He's so great.

373

:

So I go to Duluth, Minnesota.

374

:

We were doing long distance at the time.

375

:

And so I'd go visit him and every time.

376

:

We would go to RCIA because Sam was

in the process of becoming Catholic.

377

:

And again, at this time, I'm just

trying to like humble my heart and

378

:

be more open to the Catholic faith

and helping support him in this.

379

:

Um, and so we'd go to RCIA.

380

:

So I met father Mike and I

think something I appreciate is

381

:

because I wasn't raised Catholic.

382

:

I wasn't like obsessive.

383

:

Yeah, it wasn't like a superstar moment.

384

:

Yeah.

385

:

Like a lot of.

386

:

The students at Duluth

are like, Oh my gosh.

387

:

Yeah.

388

:

Yeah.

389

:

Which they like humble themselves

out, you know, like they chill out.

390

:

But I just was like, Oh, this guy's cool.

391

:

You know, like, I don't know.

392

:

You're like, I've been

listening to your podcast.

393

:

Yeah.

394

:

I was like, okay, cool.

395

:

Like I'm stoked to meet you.

396

:

Um, and so going through

RCA, I was just like, wow.

397

:

You know, you don't realize the things

that are missing in your Protestant

398

:

faith until you become Catholic, until

you start looking into Catholicism.

399

:

What are some of those things

that you felt like, wow, like the

400

:

Protestant faith is missing this?

401

:

Well, I feel like there's so

many answers in Catholicism.

402

:

Like the catechism has it all.

403

:

It's just like locked and loaded.

404

:

But I would say Mary's role,

understanding who Mary is, I would

405

:

say, you, you never questioned

like, Oh, like anyone can become a

406

:

pastor, but then it's like, How do

you know that they're qualified?

407

:

Like they go to one, two years, two

years of like, uh, formation school and

408

:

then they become, whereas like some, you

know, seminary six, like a long time.

409

:

It's like seven years,

devoting their entire life.

410

:

I would also say.

411

:

The unity of marriage, the

deep, deep theology of marriage.

412

:

Yeah.

413

:

I think even now being married,

like chatting with my friends that

414

:

just got married, like they all say

things and they're like, wait, what?

415

:

You know, like every time you were

intimate with your husband, like

416

:

you were renewing your wedding vows.

417

:

Like you are becoming a saint.

418

:

And it's a sacrament, it's a sacrament.

419

:

I know like grace flows through that.

420

:

And it's just so beautiful.

421

:

I think the more I peel back the

onion, like the more I was like finding

422

:

answers and wishing that the process of

faith had answers to, but they didn't

423

:

ooh.

424

:

So you were going to RCIA,

finding all these answers,

425

:

loving what you were hearing.

426

:

So yeah, I was going to RCIA and I

was like slowly like questioning my

427

:

Protestant non denominational background.

428

:

I just was becoming more

and more , okay, John Six.

429

:

The Eucharist like that's wild and at

first I remember sitting in candlelight

430

:

mass and looking at the Eucharist

and I texted Kelly and I was like

431

:

Kelly am I supposed to be like seeing

anything special what's going on here?

432

:

Like I just see like this gold

thing and even my first non

433

:

nominational mind was like it's

an idol it's in this Gold thing.

434

:

It's like a it's the golden

calf, you know, like I was like

435

:

Idolization, but then I Was like,

wait, the Eucharist is so beautiful.

436

:

It needs to be in like, in

a pure gold, like for sure.

437

:

I mean, it's the Lord.

438

:

Yeah.

439

:

Like the Lord.

440

:

And I, and he was , the Lord is so humble

to come in such a form as this, you

441

:

know, a piece of bread, piece of bread.

442

:

And the more I was hoping for

answers to be wrong, I kept seeing

443

:

the truth in the Catholic church.

444

:

So, do you feel like in this experience

of looking for answers, your attraction

445

:

to the Catholic faith came from a place

of like, wow, this is so beautiful,

446

:

I wish my Protestant faith had that?

447

:

Or was it realizing like,

Oh, my Protestant faith

448

:

teachings are actually wrong.

449

:

I would say the first one, I wish

my faith had that, or like, you

450

:

don't realize what you're missing

until you see what you're missing.

451

:

And so adoration, there's no such thing

as adoration in a non nominational church.

452

:

There's not an intimate chapel where

you can just cry out to the Lord.

453

:

Yes, you can do that in any, any space

in your home, but it's not the same.

454

:

. I remember also I'd be

sitting in candlelight mass.

455

:

My mouth would start

watering during communion.

456

:

And I like told grace.

457

:

I was like, why?

458

:

And is my mouth watering?

459

:

Like I crave this like I

want to receive, you know?

460

:

That is beautiful.

461

:

Yeah, it is.

462

:

That's literally grace.

463

:

Yeah.

464

:

And every time I walk up to communion

now I'm like, I'm so unworthy.

465

:

Mm-Hmm.

466

:

I can't believe I get to

partake in the greatest feast.

467

:

Mm-Hmm.

468

:

, you know?

469

:

I remember one time I was at

Mass with Sam, Father Mike

470

:

was, you know, doing his thing.

471

:

And after Mass, I remember seeing

all these girls during communion

472

:

going up and receiving, like,

these beautiful Catholic girls.

473

:

And I started feeling, like, doubt,

you know, of like, will Sam, like,

474

:

want to marry a Catholic girl?

475

:

Like, will he have wished that

he married a Catholic girl?

476

:

He's becoming Catholic.

477

:

And so at this point, how long

have you guys been dating?

478

:

Like, it's getting serious.

479

:

It had been, like, eight years.

480

:

Okay.

481

:

Yeah.

482

:

Yeah.

483

:

Um, and we talked about like,

we believe dating is like a year

484

:

for us and then get engaged.

485

:

So it was like halfway through that

and serious conversations going

486

:

really well, other than like the

hard conversations with Catholicism.

487

:

And I should preface , he never

pushed me into Catholicism.

488

:

He was so hands off.

489

:

He was like, I made

this decision by myself.

490

:

And , you will do the same.

491

:

If this is for you, that's great.

492

:

And , I'm here to , welcome you.

493

:

Like if you make that decision,

but , there was no pressure

494

:

on , you will make that decision.

495

:

And so after mass, I'm, I asked

him, I was like, will you have

496

:

wished you married a Catholic girl?

497

:

And he was like.

498

:

I hope one day you become

catholic and I was bawling.

499

:

I was just Like i'm so torn I see the

beauty and the truth in the church but I

500

:

also have this pride in me the worldly

view is like I can't like I can't I

501

:

could I could never become catholic the

pride of like what the catholic church

502

:

is perceived as And like you being

like oh I could never be that right.

503

:

Like I would never want to be that.

504

:

Oh yeah.

505

:

And even in my first year of being

Catholic, like people would be

506

:

like, where do you go to church?

507

:

And I'd be like, um, so it's still

something like I worked through

508

:

of like, I'm love Catholicism.

509

:

I love the truth and beauty of the

Catholic faith, but there's still

510

:

times like the world hates the

Catholic church and that's undeniable.

511

:

And so.

512

:

Sometimes it feels kooky because you're

like, why would I make that decision?

513

:

Like anyone can welcome a non

denominational believer, but to

514

:

say you're Catholic is very bold.

515

:

It is.

516

:

So after this conversation with Sam,

you're having a hard time because

517

:

obviously his answer is saying, I

hope you one day will become Catholic.

518

:

So he's not necessarily like saying

like, no, Sydney, like, of course I'm

519

:

okay with you, you know, marrying an un

Catholic girl, but he's not also saying

520

:

like, Yeah, no, I will, I'm going to

leave you to go for a Catholic girl,

521

:

you know, but he's kind of just like,

I, like, I hope, I hope that this is

522

:

you, you know, he's kind of insinuating

like, yeah, like I want my future

523

:

wife to become Catholic, how did you

wrestle with that in the months to come?

524

:

And like, what was that final push

where you said, yep, this is it.

525

:

The rosary, like everyone go play, go

pray your West coast Catholic rosary.

526

:

Yes.

527

:

So I started praying the rosary.

528

:

I was gifted one and whenever I drove

up to Duluth, um, cause I ended up

529

:

moving back home to Minnesota cause

I, Sam and I were getting serious

530

:

and I was like, okay, I want to

live at home to be closer to him.

531

:

He'll be coming home from

school and then we'll be close.

532

:

, so I would drive up to Duluth and I

would pray the rosary every single time.

533

:

So I at least pray it once a

week, which I feel like it's

534

:

pretty good for a non Catholic.

535

:

Yeah.

536

:

So every Friday I would pray it.

537

:

Um, who taught you to pray the rosary?

538

:

A folks missionary at Colorado

state, she sat me down.

539

:

I was like, can we pray this?

540

:

Like, I'm so intrigued.

541

:

And at first it was like, so obscure.

542

:

I was like, okay, why do we keep

repeating the same or same prayer

543

:

and , I'm holding this object.

544

:

, even a friend of mine the other

day, she was in my car and she's

545

:

like, this feels so religious.

546

:

Um, it is, but it's so beautiful.

547

:

It's beautiful.

548

:

And.

549

:

Just through, I feel like the prayer of

the rosary, like all my anxieties were

550

:

flushed out and just so much peace came.

551

:

And I remember it was always, what is it?

552

:

The sorrowful mysteries.

553

:

And so I would just cry.

554

:

Cause you're driving up on the weekends.

555

:

I'm driving up on the weekends.

556

:

Oh my gosh.

557

:

That's every Friday.

558

:

And I would just fall on Fridays in my

car because I was just like, never have

559

:

I sat and meditated on those leading

stages up to Jesus's death so frequently

560

:

and so heavy in a place of peace.

561

:

That is so beautiful.

562

:

How did you become open

minded enough to do that?

563

:

Because I think it's one thing

to be learning about the church

564

:

and feelings of like, wow, that's

so beautiful and desiring that.

565

:

But I know Mary is one of the biggest

obstacles for Protestants and the

566

:

idea that or the misconception

that Catholics worship Mary.

567

:

So how did you kind of , I guess

skirt around that and be like,

568

:

okay, I don't worship Mary, but,

I'm going to pray the rosary, which

569

:

is asking for Mary's intercession.

570

:

Right.

571

:

And it is, and the, the big

misconception about the rosary is

572

:

that people think that it is a prayer

that worships Mary when really it

573

:

is asking for Mary's intercession

and meditating on the life of Jesus.

574

:

Like you're saying the whole

prayer is literally meditating

575

:

on the life of Jesus in scripture

through like the eyes of Mary.

576

:

Right.

577

:

Um, so how did you become open to that?

578

:

Was it just like, you were like, well,

I guess this is the next step or.

579

:

I don't know.

580

:

I never really had a hold up with Mary.

581

:

It was weird.

582

:

So many converting into the church,

that's their biggest thing.

583

:

Yeah.

584

:

But to me, , once I

understood intercession.

585

:

I was like, Oh, this is beautiful.

586

:

Just clicked.

587

:

Yes.

588

:

It clicked.

589

:

Mary wasn't a big holdup, even

though she is for so many people.

590

:

I think things that were a holdup

for me was like, um, like the

591

:

monstrance, idolization, like saints

were pretty confusing to me, but then

592

:

I was also like, that's beautiful.

593

:

They've lived really Christ centered

lives and , now we get to view their

594

:

lives as the primary example of how

to live out the Christian faith well.

595

:

And so.

596

:

I don't know, I was blessed that Mary

wasn't like a huge hold up for me.

597

:

That's beautiful.

598

:

So you were praying the rosary on Fridays.

599

:

And I just think my heart like

slowly got transformed and it got

600

:

to a point where I came up for Sam's

confirmation and he became Catholic

601

:

and I was like, this is so beautiful.

602

:

And I kind of knew, This is me, next year.

603

:

And, making that decision was really hard.

604

:

, I was kind of , one foot in.

605

:

One foot out.

606

:

I was like, wait.

607

:

It got to a point where , I

want to go to confession.

608

:

I want , someone to , hear my

sins and , let that load off.

609

:

But I couldn't, you know, and so I

think being in the Duluth Newman center,

610

:

being around really devout, holy, holy

Catholics, I was open to a whole new

611

:

level of Christianity and like striving

for excellence that I hadn't seen before.

612

:

And so after Sam got confirmed.

613

:

Shortly after I actually was applying for

a job at a Catholic publishing company

614

:

and I had to write a letter to them.

615

:

And so I wrote my testimony and in

it, I was like, and I'm becoming

616

:

Catholic and I sent it to Sam and he

just was like, Oh my gosh, no way.

617

:

I'm going to cry.

618

:

He was probably so excited.

619

:

So I sent it to Sam.

620

:

I sent it to Grace and Kelly, who ended

up being my confirmation sponsors, , they

621

:

were just like, Oh my gosh, like, I can't

believe, You're committing to this.

622

:

This is so beautiful.

623

:

Praise God.

624

:

So it's so beautiful to, to

stand by someone and see the

625

:

process start to finish.

626

:

It's, so inspiring, like for the one who

is Catholic to see how the Lord works.

627

:

And I think what gets me so

emotional about stories like this,

628

:

or seeing friends convert is you

just see the love of the Lord.

629

:

And it just reminds me

of the good shepherd.

630

:

And it's just like, The Lord is

relentless in going after every

631

:

single one of his children.

632

:

And you were like super closed off to it

at first, but he was like, nah, like I

633

:

want you with me and I'm not giving up.

634

:

And he gave you all the

grace along the way.

635

:

That is so beautiful.

636

:

So what were the reactions of your

friends and your family members?

637

:

Throughout the process of discernment

and then when you actually chose like

638

:

i'm gonna become catholic What were

what were those relationships like

639

:

and what were those reactions like?

640

:

So when sam said he was becoming

catholic a lot of my friend group from

641

:

college like my bestie girls were like

You Uh, you need to break up with him.

642

:

Like, it's not even the, like, if and

or but, like, you should end it with him

643

:

because he doesn't actually love Jesus.

644

:

And I was just So heartbroken by that.

645

:

I also had friends that were like,

I'm gonna be honest I don't know

646

:

much about Catholicism, but I will be

here for prayer, you know like I will

647

:

pray with you through this process

648

:

It's really hard to hear from your best

friends that you've like grown You So much

649

:

within college that they don't support

you, you know, like one of them even told

650

:

me like, I don't support your marriage.

651

:

Like if y'all get married

and like, that's hard.

652

:

That's so hard.

653

:

Did any of them, did you, did you

lose friendships through this?

654

:

Did any of them like turn away and not

lose, but like people would say things

655

:

and you're like, that were hurtful.

656

:

Yeah.

657

:

And people do still say things where

I am like, what do you mean by that?

658

:

You know, um, because it's not true,

you know, like, don't tell me what

659

:

the Catholic church is because I know

the Catholic church and you do the

660

:

research, you go to RCIA for a year,

then let me know what you think.

661

:

Right.

662

:

Like I had someone say like, the

Catholic church believes in multiple

663

:

heavens and all these things.

664

:

And I was like, yo, that's Mormonism.

665

:

That's not Catholic.

666

:

I know the Catholic church, trust me.

667

:

Like, I would not believe in that.

668

:

And so, yes, I had a lot of

friends that were not supportive.

669

:

And some of them came around, but I

still think they're like very hesitant.

670

:

And then as far as family, no one

, implicitly said anything, but no one in

671

:

my family is Catholic and no one really

supports Catholicism, I would say.

672

:

And so I think that was hard because

they saw it as like very extreme.

673

:

Like, why would you become Catholic?

674

:

You know?

675

:

Yeah.

676

:

Cause I know that I've had , Friends

who grew up Protestant, became

677

:

Catholic, told their parents, and

their parents like broke down crying.

678

:

And it was like the worst news

that they could have ever heard.

679

:

Was for your family more of just like,

confusion, or was it just like, don't

680

:

really get what you're doing now, but

that's fine, or was it like, Right.

681

:

You are going down the wrong path.

682

:

It wasn't like they were saying

I was going down the wrong path.

683

:

It was more so just like, yeah, confusion.

684

:

And then also, what does this

mean for our family in the future?

685

:

Like, oh, it's Sunday.

686

:

, we want to go to church, but

you're trying to go to mass?

687

:

Like, how does that work?

688

:

Oh, yeah.

689

:

In the future, godparents

and baptism, that's different.

690

:

Yeah.

691

:

You know?

692

:

Yeah.

693

:

And so it's been really beautiful

though, seeing my family come like

694

:

to be super supportive, I would say.

695

:

Like, it's like, oh, of course we

go to mass on Sundays, you know?

696

:

Do they go with you?

697

:

No.

698

:

Oh, . Oh, of course you

go to mass on Sundays.

699

:

Yeah, of course.

700

:

Sam and I go to Mass on Sundays.

701

:

Um, like, it's not like I

have to hide it anymore.

702

:

Yeah.

703

:

And so, and like when we have

a kid like getting 'em baptized

704

:

right away, like Yeah, I know.

705

:

They'll be super excited about that.

706

:

Um, that's beautiful.

707

:

And so it's been really cool.

708

:

To see.

709

:

And then I think some people

just like, hush, hush.

710

:

Don't say anything, which is fine.

711

:

Like, but I want to

talk about Catholicism.

712

:

Like, I want to be like, ask me questions.

713

:

You know, you're like, I want

everybody to be Catholic.

714

:

So now that you are Catholic,

you've been Catholic for like

715

:

a year, a year and a half.

716

:

Just over a year.

717

:

That's amazing.

718

:

Still a baby Catholic.

719

:

Now that you've embraced your

faith fully, what parts of

720

:

Catholicism do you love the most?

721

:

Do you feel like resonate

with you the most?

722

:

I would say adoration because

Yes, you have deep prayer time

723

:

and like worship, but you don't

have anything like adoration.

724

:

So I love adoration I would also say like

The battle of like praying the Rosary,

725

:

like it's the flesh verse, like, you

know, like prayer, like sometimes I'll

726

:

be like, Oh, I don't want to pray the

Rosary or , I don't want to , spend time,

727

:

meditating on these prayers say, but then

once I do, the graces are so abundant.

728

:

So real.

729

:

And so I would say I love the

meditation and then I love the

730

:

quietness of the Catholic faith.

731

:

What do you mean by that

by like the quietness?

732

:

I think a lot of non

denominational churches it's

733

:

about what can I get out of it?

734

:

The lights the camera the action like,

you know smoke confetti cannons like

735

:

everything like a whole production It's

a whole production which can be fun.

736

:

And I think like our other teammates

Sarah said it well that's camp when

737

:

we're worshiping the Lord, we should

be in so much reverence and a beauty

738

:

of the fear of the Lord, you know,

sitting there in awe and silence and just

739

:

thanking the Lord for what he's done.

740

:

Cause it's not about us.

741

:

Like, it's not about what I can get out

of mass because you're not going, you're

742

:

not going to get out anything out of mass.

743

:

If like, that's the mindset

you're going into it with.

744

:

And so.

745

:

I would say , Just the simplicity

and like it's just not about us.

746

:

Yeah, and that's the beauty.

747

:

No, I love that I think you know, we all

experience this at some point or another

748

:

when we really dive into prayer But the

Lord works through the silence so much

749

:

and when we finally are able to step away

from our lives Quiet the noise of the

750

:

whole world and just be with the Lord.

751

:

That's where you find like clarity

and peace and understanding.

752

:

And like you said, like

worship is good and beautiful.

753

:

And these non churches have beautiful,

beautiful bands and song and worship

754

:

that I think like has even helped my

prayer life, but there's a time and place

755

:

for that, and then there's a time and

place for worship and father going back

756

:

to father Mike, actually, he has his

big talk of like, uh, What's it called?

757

:

Like do you, how to, how to pray

the mass or something like that.

758

:

And he always talks about

how worship is sacrifice.

759

:

And so mass, the reason it's worship is

because the sacrifice of the lamb, on the

760

:

altar, it's not supposed to be a party.

761

:

Like that's another, that's another

time and place, but mass prayer,

762

:

it's, it's silence, it's sacrifice.

763

:

It's reverence.

764

:

Yeah.

765

:

And I would say a huge thing.

766

:

That changed my outlook on Catholicism

in the mass was the hour that'll change

767

:

your life YouTube video by Father Mike.

768

:

It was a Sikh talk back in the day

It was like I think a million views

769

:

or so Yeah, it's huge but Kelly sent

me that and I was sitting there and

770

:

I was just like awestruck because

I was like Oh my gosh, like it all

771

:

lines up like it all makes sense.

772

:

I want to be intimate with Christ You

know and like I want to receive And

773

:

so, yeah, that's really beautiful.

774

:

Thank you for sharing

your story so openly.

775

:

So honestly, I love hearing

all the little details.

776

:

So many that I haven't heard before.

777

:

Maybe there are people who are listening,

who were in the same boat as you, maybe

778

:

there's people who are interested or maybe

just like curious or intrigued about the

779

:

Catholic faith , or intimidated or scared.

780

:

What would be your advice

to people who are exploring

781

:

converting to the Catholic faith?

782

:

I would say, pray for a humble heart.

783

:

That is step number one, because the

Lord cannot do anything through pride.

784

:

Humility prayer and action,

like be humble, pray through the

785

:

process and then take action.

786

:

You're going to have to make a decision.

787

:

You have to be bold and step into that.

788

:

And it's going to feel

so scary for most people.

789

:

But I think like just trusting in

the Lord, it's such a great test,

790

:

trust in the Lord, like he's got you.

791

:

So beautiful.

792

:

Sydney, if people want to hear more

of you or find you on socials or the

793

:

internet, where can they find you?

794

:

You can shop Darling and

divine@darlinganddivine.co.

795

:

And then on Instagram,

it's Darling divine.co.

796

:

And then my personal

Instagram is Sydnee period.

797

:

Tanner.

798

:

Amazing.

799

:

What do you talk about

on Sydney period tanner?

800

:

Well, I love working out.

801

:

So she is your faith fitness bestie.

802

:

Okay.

803

:

So basically like anything

of how to honor the body.

804

:

Well, yeah.

805

:

Like through fitness, food, spirituality,

all the things like well roundedness.

806

:

That's so beautiful.

807

:

Thank you, Sydney.

808

:

This was such a good combo.

809

:

Yes.

810

:

Thanks guys.

Next Episode All Episodes Previous Episode

Listen for free

Show artwork for Ever Be

About the Podcast

Ever Be
A faith and lifestyle podcast.
The Ever Be Podcast is a faith and lifestyle podcast filled with meaningful conversations and practical tips that will inspire and empower you to live a Christ centered life in today’s modern world. Through her own experience of surrendering completely to God and finding true fullness of life, your host Mari Wagner, has committed to having God’s praise “ever be” on her lips and sharing that message with the world. Listen in for insightful, real life conversations and actionable steps on how to claim the full life God created you for.

With over 100K followers and counting, Instagram content creator and founder of the popular Catholic lifestyle brand, West Coast Catholic, Mari Wagner is showing the world how to live a bold, attractive, and fulfilling Catholic life by being in the world but not of it. On the podcast you’ll get a combination of heartfelt solo episodes with Mari, interviews with exciting guests, and up-close and personal time with both the Wagner’s—Mari and Trey. What more could you ask for?!

Finally! Answers to questions you’ve been asking like:
How do I infuse prayer into my daily life? How do I live out my Catholic faith? What is the best dating and marriage advice? What does a good Catholic marriage look like? How do I grow in homemaking skills and build a domestic church? How do I create a beautiful and welcoming home? What does a healthy and balanced lifestyle look like? Is it possible to find a solid community of like minded women?

Host Mari Wagner covers topics that you actually care about from faith life, to relationships and marriage, to homemaking, to healthy living. Each episode is crafted to resonate with your challenges and aspirations as a modern Christian woman seeking purpose, balance, and joy.

Tune into the Ever Be Podcast for valuable advice, relatable stories, expert insights and just some fun girl chats with someone who really gets you. Hit play to get out of the rut you constantly feel yourself in, and subscribe to join the community and experience the fullness of life Jesus has in store for you.

About your host

Profile picture for Mari Wagner

Mari Wagner