Episode 73

full
Published on:

29th Oct 2025

73: The 5 Secrets to Deeper Marital Unity

Join our BRAND NEW Kingdom Club on Patreon! Members get exclusive perks such as:

šŸ•ŠLive monthly Bible Study group led by Mari

šŸŽ™Post-show After-Party Q&A Access with Mari & Trey

šŸ’¬ Only Kingdom Club members get to submit questions for weekly Q&A's

šŸ¤— Join a private community of like-minded women trying to live Christ-centered lives

šŸŽ„ Watch the podcast, not just listen - video access exclusive to Kingdom Club members

šŸŽ Free Kingdom Club Ball Cap Welcome gift for members who pay annually

------

JPII Healing Center Website

Mari and Trey dive into five different types of marital communion: spiritual unity, emotional intimacy, companionship, teamwork, and sexual intimacy. They share personal experiences, challenges, and effective practices to deepen each type of unity in marriage. They discuss what it takes to build a strong, God-centered relationship. Additionally, they address a listenerā€™s question about the television series ā€˜The Chosen.ā€™ Tune in for a conversation on nurturing love and connection in marriage.

00:18 Exciting New Launch

01:08 Five Types of Marital Communion

01:52 Ever Be Moments: A Trip to Columbia

04:37 Introduction to Marital Communion

09:18 Spiritual Unity in Marriage

18:17 Emotional Intimacy: The Glue of Marriage

31:22 Companionship: Sharing Life Together

39:33 The Importance of Teamwork in Marriage

48:16 Sexual Intimacy in Marriage

56:52 Summary and Final Thoughts

01:00:00 Ever Be Answers: The Chosen

------

Episode Sponsors

West Coast Catholic - NEW Sweatshirt Collection

Every Sacred Sunday - Use code EVERBE10 for 10% off your order

Truly Free - Get 50 free loads of dish soap + 2 products for free!

------

Follow Along:

Ever Be Podcast Instagram

Mari Wagner Instagram

West Coast Catholic Instagram

Transcript
Speaker:

Hey, I am your host, Mari Wagner,

and you're listening to The Ever Be

2

:

Podcast where Faith Meets Lifestyle.

3

:

I'm so excited you're here.

4

:

Whether you're a new listener

or a longtime follower, I know

5

:

there's something here for you.

6

:

Pull up a chair and listen in for

insightful, real life conversations and

7

:

actionable steps on how to claim the.

8

:

Full life God created you for.

9

:

If you're a woman desiring to live

a Christ-centered life in today's

10

:

modern world, then this is for you.

11

:

Welcome to ever be.

12

:

m-t_10_10-29-2025_114645: Hello.

13

:

Hello.

14

:

Welcome back to Ever Be Today.

15

:

I've got Trey on as a guest again.

16

:

Yay.

17

:

I'm back.

18

:

It's been a while.

19

:

I feel like since you've been on

the podcast like for full episode.

20

:

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

21

:

We do the after parties every week

that I'm on, but So now you're

22

:

on Ever Be stuff kind of a lot.

23

:

But not for a full episode.

24

:

It's while, but not for a full episode.

25

:

Yeah, and I'm excited for today's, um,

if you are on Patreon, you are probably

26

:

watching this on video or you're able

to, and you can see that I'm wearing the

27

:

brand new West Coast Catholic sweatshirt.

28

:

It's the Catholic varsity mock

neck one, and I've got the gold

29

:

dainty sacred heart necklace, and

30

:

I just am so happy that it's

launched and that it's out there.

31

:

I've had it for a long time and

there's been so many times where I'm

32

:

wearing it around the house and I

sit down to record a podcast and then

33

:

I'm like, Ugh, you have to change.

34

:

I have to change.

35

:

Like I have to take the sweatshirt

off 'cause it's not launched yet

36

:

and like people can't see it yet.

37

:

So I'm so glad that I just get to

wear it and just like have it on the

38

:

podcast and on video because I truly

wear it like I wear these sweatshirts.

39

:

Yeah, all the time.

40

:

You've been obsessed.

41

:

I've been obsessed.

42

:

They're so comfy and they're so cute.

43

:

So.

44

:

Anyways, that's that.

45

:

Today we're gonna be chatting about five

different types of marital communion.

46

:

I did a little bit of like a

story series on this months ago,

47

:

maybe like six months ago or so,

or maybe even, almost a year ago.

48

:

It's so wild, but.

49

:

It got so many story views and so many

conversations were happening in my dms.

50

:

Um, and so it seemed like it was like a

topic that really piqued your interest

51

:

that you wanted to learn more about,

that maybe you hadn't ever heard about,

52

:

um, in any sort of marriage like.

53

:

Formation or anything like that.

54

:

So I'm excited to dive a little

bit deeper in them today.

55

:

Yeah, me too.

56

:

I mean, this has been a big part of

our marriage and our relationship.

57

:

Mm-hmm.

58

:

And, uh, I do think it's gonna

be really, really beneficial and

59

:

helpful to a lot of you guys.

60

:

Yeah.

61

:

Well, before we dive in, let's start

off with our ever Be Moments segment.

62

:

This is your first ever be moment.

63

:

First ever be moments.

64

:

I was wondering if you

were gonna remember.

65

:

Yes, yes, yes, I did remember.

66

:

So, uh, do you have one?

67

:

Or do I have to go first?

68

:

How about you go first.

69

:

I usually have my guests go first.

70

:

Okay, great.

71

:

Well, we might have the same one.

72

:

Uh, the ever be moment was

going to Columbia last week.

73

:

We spontaneously booked a flight,

uh, last weekend on Saturday night

74

:

and flew out Sunday, uh, to fly to

Columbia, south America where Mari

75

:

grew up and, uh, visit her family.

76

:

Mm-hmm.

77

:

And it felt so like.

78

:

Peaceful and like we were meant to go.

79

:

Like I felt very driven and

led by the Holy Spirit mm-hmm.

80

:

Uh, to do that.

81

:

Like there was just, even though

it was kind of a crazy trip and

82

:

last minute, and, uh, it just felt

very like of the Lord and there's

83

:

a lot of peace in there and mm-hmm.

84

:

And then obviously the trip was

amazing and being able to see mm-hmm.

85

:

Mari's family, uh, and her grandma

and see the house and the place

86

:

where she grew up was really special.

87

:

And so That's fine.

88

:

Yeah.

89

:

I mean, I was kind of gonna say

the same thing, basically, like it

90

:

was such a crazy spur of the moment

thing, but for some reason it just

91

:

felt like God was working in it.

92

:

Like for some reason God called us to

go and I think it was a very special

93

:

trip that we're gonna cherish forever.

94

:

We made so many memories in such

a short amount of time together

95

:

and with my extended family,

and I just know the Lord was.

96

:

Really present in those moments,

and we also were able to give my

97

:

grandma holy water to bless her

house before she sold her house.

98

:

That's why we went down there.

99

:

Did you already say that?

100

:

Uh, not why we went down.

101

:

No.

102

:

Yeah, yeah.

103

:

So if you didn't see on Instagram, we

flew down to Columbia like literally

104

:

one day to the next because my grandma

told me she was selling her house

105

:

and I thought I was gonna be okay.

106

:

Not like saying goodbye to the house.

107

:

And Trey had never been to Columbia,

so he like never got to see the house.

108

:

And I was like, that's fine,

I'll, I'll get over it.

109

:

And a couple weeks went by and then I

couldn't get outta my head and I was

110

:

like, Trey, we have to go to Columbia.

111

:

And then it happened to be that.

112

:

My dad was flying the next day to

Columbia for like a work thing,

113

:

and he was like, just come with me.

114

:

Yeah.

115

:

And we were like, what?

116

:

Okay.

117

:

And so we booked flights for the next

day and that's why we were down there.

118

:

Um.

119

:

But yeah, it was so beautiful.

120

:

Oh, yeah.

121

:

And we were able to give my grandma holy

water to bless her home and just have

122

:

like a beautiful, like closing to this

chapter of my grandma's home in Columbia.

123

:

Although I still have very high

hopes that maybe I can convince my

124

:

dad to buy it or, or to not sell it.

125

:

Not sell it basically.

126

:

And, um, and keep it, so, yeah.

127

:

Yep.

128

:

Okay.

129

:

Now back to the episode.

130

:

Now back to the episode five

types of marital communion.

131

:

So where did we get this from?

132

:

We are not marriage therapists

or marriage experts.

133

:

Nope.

134

:

We've only been married, um,

like four and a half years or so.

135

:

And so we're still very much

learning, but we both are super

136

:

passionate about God-centered

marriages and healthy marriages.

137

:

So.

138

:

I feel like at this point in our

relationship, dating, engagement, and

139

:

marriage, we've actually dove into like

marriage resources like quite a bit.

140

:

Yeah.

141

:

And a few years ago we did a marriage

retreat with the JP two Healing

142

:

Center that's based out of Florida.

143

:

They flew here to Colorado and they

hosted a retreat and it was so incredible.

144

:

Yeah.

145

:

Like highly recommend for anybody.

146

:

It was amazing.

147

:

If there's ever a JP two healing center.

148

:

Yeah.

149

:

That's what it's called.

150

:

Uh, retreat going on.

151

:

In your state or even a few states

over that you can drive to or get to?

152

:

I would definitely recommend going.

153

:

So recommend the marriage.

154

:

One is called Unveiled and it is

like we went just like a year and a

155

:

half into marriage, or maybe it was,

it's like two years into marriage,

156

:

two years into marriage, and we were

like, what do we have to go for?

157

:

We're newlyweds.

158

:

We don't have like serious issues.

159

:

Yeah, like we have like.

160

:

You know, uh, kinks that

were working out Sure.

161

:

But like in normal marriage stuff,

but like, not like problems.

162

:

Right.

163

:

And we, and, and newsflash like,

you don't need to go to a, you

164

:

don't need to have problems No.

165

:

To go to a retreat.

166

:

Right.

167

:

Definitely not.

168

:

It's just an opportunity to

deepen your marriage, deepen your

169

:

relationship with the Lord, and

like root your marriage in Christ.

170

:

And so we went and we just were

so grateful that we went and.

171

:

In one of their sessions they talked

about five types of marital communion.

172

:

So this is like their content that

we are just gonna share with you guys

173

:

that we learned and we'll share with

you guys what those five types are.

174

:

We're gonna share a little bit about

like how we've experienced strengthening

175

:

that certain type of marital communion

in our relationship, and then they

176

:

taught us what are the obstacles.

177

:

To that like aspect of marital communion

and what are some practices you can

178

:

do to kind of bridge that gap and

strengthen that part of your marriage?

179

:

Um, so I really hope it's gonna

be like really like hands-on,

180

:

kind of workshopy style here.

181

:

Bring your husband, your wife,

and a notebook and like take notes

182

:

'cause it's gonna be really good.

183

:

Yep.

184

:

Um, all that to say, I just wanna

start out by saying that like.

185

:

Communion and unity in your marriage isn't

like automatic and doesn't just happen

186

:

because you're married and in love, right?

187

:

Mm-hmm.

188

:

Marriage takes work and you've probably

heard of that, and it doesn't just

189

:

take work because sometimes it's hard.

190

:

And you have to like work

at like loving each other.

191

:

It just takes work to have a

beautiful, healthy marriage because

192

:

it doesn't happen on its own.

193

:

It's cultivated and we have to put

in the time and the energy to give

194

:

to our spouse to recognize where

we can better love our spouse.

195

:

Recognize different ways that we can

connect, that we can stretch each

196

:

other, that we can connect and grow in

different parts of our relationship.

197

:

Yeah.

198

:

And every, like, everything you're

saying, Mari, like marriage isn't held

199

:

together by feelings or compatibility,

but it's held together by communion.

200

:

Which is the unity of

two lives becoming one.

201

:

Mm-hmm.

202

:

And so, like Mari said,

communion isn't automatic.

203

:

It's not like because you're

married, you have communion.

204

:

Mm-hmm.

205

:

It's takes work.

206

:

And so communion is cultivated

just like Mari said.

207

:

Mm-hmm.

208

:

Yeah.

209

:

And it happens over time too, right?

210

:

Mm-hmm.

211

:

And there's different facets of your

marriage that you can connect on and

212

:

that will strengthen your marriage

as you kind of like strengthen these

213

:

different like parts of your marriage.

214

:

And that can happen over time too.

215

:

So I'm sure that like.

216

:

There's ways that we've grown together

in these just four and a half years.

217

:

Yep.

218

:

That then like there's gonna be other

ways we grow together in our like five

219

:

to 10 years of marriage and then other

ways in 10 to 20, you know what I mean?

220

:

Oh yeah.

221

:

So also as you're listening to these,

definitely like lean into all of them,

222

:

but also know that like growth happens

over time and your marriage isn't gonna

223

:

be like completely transformed overnight.

224

:

Yep.

225

:

Okay.

226

:

Let's jump in.

227

:

Great.

228

:

What are the five types

of communion Marie?

229

:

Okay.

230

:

Five different types of marital communion.

231

:

I have my little chart up from the

workbook that we did on the retreat.

232

:

We have spiritual unity.

233

:

Emotional intimacy, companionship,

teamwork, and sexual intimacy.

234

:

These are five different areas of

marital communion that are going to

235

:

bring you together and strengthen your

marriage and give you an opportunity

236

:

to connect on so many different levels.

237

:

We'll go through one by one.

238

:

. Okay.

239

:

First one is spiritual unity.

240

:

What is spiritual unity?

241

:

Spiritual unity is the foundation

for a Christian marriage.

242

:

It is building your home in the Lord.

243

:

It flows from the graces of your

sacrament, and it's really about

244

:

living the true meaning of your

covenant with God and each other.

245

:

So it's that spiritual connection

that you both have in your

246

:

marriage that's rooted in God?

247

:

And I think an important part of

spiritual, spiritual communion

248

:

is recognizing that your marriage

is actually a sacrament, not

249

:

a legal binding arrangement.

250

:

It's not a contract, but it's a covenant.

251

:

Right?

252

:

It's like this, like how do

you explain covenant again?

253

:

Well, covenant is, it's like.

254

:

If there's relationship, like a covenant

takes a relationship to the next level.

255

:

Yeah.

256

:

Like it's a more serious, more um,

it's like in the Old Testament when

257

:

they would exchange covenants, there's

oftentimes like a blood type thing.

258

:

It's like you become family.

259

:

It's like family bonds are formed.

260

:

Yeah, exactly.

261

:

Right?

262

:

Mm-hmm.

263

:

So that's an important thing to remember.

264

:

Like your marriage is actually

a spiritual sacrament.

265

:

There are graces that flow through

it, and there's great spiritual

266

:

importance and like meaning behind that.

267

:

It's not just like an agreement or just

two people living in a house, right?

268

:

Yep.

269

:

And I think too, like.

270

:

Obviously us being Catholic, it's

like the spiritual part is very real

271

:

and it's like we're body and soul.

272

:

And so there's uh, levels of

unity in here that relate to your

273

:

emotional and your physical as

like the body and your emotions.

274

:

But then there's also like, we can't

forget the soul and the spiritual

275

:

and all, and like ultimately the.

276

:

The spiritual aspects of our

beings are often like the most

277

:

intimate parts of our being.

278

:

Oh yeah.

279

:

And so, uh, I know people like couples.

280

:

Like, pray like they would rather

like be, you know, in other areas

281

:

of intimacy are way easier for

them than spiritual intimacy.

282

:

Mm-hmm.

283

:

And that's like really challenging

because it's so deep and like

284

:

raw, vulnerable and vulnerable.

285

:

And so, um, so yeah.

286

:

I mean obviously it's

very, very important.

287

:

Yeah.

288

:

So what are some ways that we

have strengthened our spiritual

289

:

unity throughout the years?

290

:

Well, I know we've said this in the

podcast before, but, uh, I think

291

:

the biggest like strength and asset

that we have in our marriage for

292

:

spiritual unity is the fact that we

pray together every single night.

293

:

Yeah.

294

:

Um, every single night before we go to

bed, as right before we drift off to

295

:

sleep, we're laying in bed and we'll

just alternate who prays that night.

296

:

Mm-hmm.

297

:

And so it's just very casual,

just a free prayer, um, thanking

298

:

God for the day and mm-hmm.

299

:

Uh.

300

:

Sharing any intentions that we

have or petitions and praying for

301

:

people in our life, um, or things

going on in our lives, or if one of

302

:

us is having a bad day or a rough.

303

:

Time or there's like a certain, uh,

there's like anxiety or stress or

304

:

something, like a need that one of us has.

305

:

Yeah.

306

:

Then we'll like pray, like do

intercession prayer, uh, for that person.

307

:

Um, so, uh, sometimes it takes

like, it's a, it's a ten second

308

:

prayer and sometimes it's like a

five minute prayer, and so yeah.

309

:

Um, it, it, it varies, but that's,

I mean, that's like our anchor.

310

:

That's our anchor, and I can't recommend

that enough to other married couples.

311

:

It's such a simple practice that

once you build up the habit, like.

312

:

It stays forever and it's so easy

to do, but it's so anchoring in your

313

:

relationship so that there's always that.

314

:

Moment where you are like sharing

your marriage with the Lord and you

315

:

are like being open and vulnerable

with your spouse and like praying

316

:

together to the Lord and then praying

to the Lord on behalf of each other.

317

:

It's just, yeah, it's beautiful.

318

:

I love it.

319

:

And it's like.

320

:

It actually is so easy.

321

:

It is like, it's so easy.

322

:

I would say that's like the easiest way to

incorporate spiritual intimacy into your

323

:

marriage is a short, quick bedtime prayer.

324

:

Yeah.

325

:

Uh, also the friends that we have, we

have lots of friends who do have kiddos,

326

:

uh, and they'll do their family prayer

before they put the kids down mm-hmm.

327

:

For bed.

328

:

So that's seven or eight

or 9:00 PM like they'll.

329

:

Pray together as a family, do a very

similar thing to what Mario and I

330

:

do, or sometimes they'll incorporate,

uh, the gospel reading of the day.

331

:

Mm-hmm.

332

:

Or, uh, something, something else, but.

333

:

Uh, just a quick two minute

family prayer, they mm-hmm.

334

:

Like, invite the kids to pray for

their intentions and, uh, thank God

335

:

for things going on in their life.

336

:

Yeah.

337

:

Uh, and it's really beautiful.

338

:

And then they put the kids down to bed.

339

:

Um, so if you have kids, you

can also include them in it.

340

:

Yeah.

341

:

I love that.

342

:

Another way that we've connected

on spiritual unity is like

343

:

reading spiritual books together.

344

:

Um, and that's either been like

marriage books that are like

345

:

from a Catholic perspective or.

346

:

At least, like I know that there's

been times where we've either read the

347

:

same spiritual book at the same time,

or you've read it and you're like, oh,

348

:

that's so good, you should read it.

349

:

Mm-hmm.

350

:

And then we get to like chat about

that a little bit and so it just opens

351

:

the door for spiritual conversations.

352

:

Yep.

353

:

Yeah.

354

:

I think other things you could do

is obviously go to mass together.

355

:

That should be a given.

356

:

Um, but you can include a daily

mass, uh, together with your spouse.

357

:

Or like, what mine I'll do is

we'll go to adoration occasionally,

358

:

uh, where we'll just both go

to the adoration chapel mm-hmm.

359

:

For 30 minutes.

360

:

An hour.

361

:

Yeah.

362

:

Uh, and do that like once a week or, yeah.

363

:

Even once a month is beautiful.

364

:

Mm-hmm.

365

:

Yeah.

366

:

Because praying together is what's going

to strengthen that spiritual unity and.

367

:

It's cheesy, but it's so true.

368

:

Like the couple that prays together

stays together and prayer is

369

:

a weapon that you use against

spiritual attack in your marriage.

370

:

Mm-hmm.

371

:

Marriage is so beautiful and so powerful,

and it is our path to sanctity to heaven.

372

:

And so it's going to be very heavily

attacked in different ways throughout

373

:

your marriage, and so the more that you're

rooted and anchored in Christ Together.

374

:

The less susceptible you

are to spiritual attack.

375

:

Yeah.

376

:

Which actually the obstacle of spiritual

unity is apathy and spiritual warfare.

377

:

What do you think of when you hear

that apathy and spiritual warfare?

378

:

What does that look like?

379

:

I mean, the first thing I think of

is just How we have experienced that

380

:

in our life, uh, in our marriage.

381

:

Um, I think in the spiritual

life, there's always gonna be

382

:

constellations and desolation.

383

:

Uh, there's just gonna be a

natural, uh, rhythm to that.

384

:

And God will provide constellations and

he might, um, not provided constellations

385

:

and it'll feel like he's absent.

386

:

Mm-hmm.

387

:

Um, the important thing though, is

that during those times is desolation.

388

:

When you feel like God's far away,

you feel like there's dryness

389

:

and prayer, um, or you feel very

distant that the important thing

390

:

is that you keep the habits that

you had during the constellations.

391

:

That's one of the, pieces of

advice that Ignatius gives, uh, in

392

:

his spiritual exercises is that,

uh, when you are in desolation.

393

:

Don't change anything.

394

:

Mm-hmm.

395

:

And so just be consistent, be

diligent, um, have the discipline and

396

:

just continue showing up for prayer.

397

:

Um, and I feel like that's in our life,

that's where things can go awry or

398

:

where these obstacles get hard or where

there is disunity in spiritual, in our

399

:

spiritual unity, uh, is when there is

apathy and it's like, oh, I feel like

400

:

God's far away, so I'll just stop praying.

401

:

Altogether.

402

:

Mm-hmm.

403

:

And they'll be like, weeks I go

outta time and I'll be like, oh wow.

404

:

I haven't prayed in like a week.

405

:

Um, and so, and it's because I

just don't care about apathy.

406

:

And so the devil will always try

to tempt you with, uh, with apathy.

407

:

And so yeah, I feel like that's

definitely been an impact.

408

:

And then when we are conscious

of that and we are intentional,

409

:

are intentional to like.

410

:

Uh, resist that temptation and like

lean into prayer, then you can feel

411

:

like it's a very tangible effect

that you feel the spiritual intimacy

412

:

or spiritual unity coming back.

413

:

Yeah, totally.

414

:

Totally.

415

:

Okay.

416

:

The practice that will

restore, um, any gaps or.

417

:

Like breakage that you have

in spiritual unity is going

418

:

to be praying and worshiping

together, not just individually.

419

:

Obviously our individual spiritual

lives are super important and

420

:

should be a priority, but what's

going to strengthen that in your

421

:

marriage is doing that to together.

422

:

So that would be like what Trey

said, praying together every night,

423

:

attending sacraments together.

424

:

Um, even like worship

music together, like.

425

:

We don't do this a lot anymore, but

we didn't, we were missionaries,

426

:

like even as a group, but like

having us be together there, I think

427

:

helped like strengthen it for me.

428

:

But like playing worship music

and just like praying with worship

429

:

music on, you know what I mean?

430

:

Like moments where you come

together and pray and worship

431

:

is going to strengthen that.

432

:

Yep.

433

:

Okay.

434

:

That's spiritual unity.

435

:

Next, what do we have, Trey?

436

:

We have emotional intimacy.

437

:

Uh, so the definition

of this is, lemme see.

438

:

Emotional intimacy is essential.

439

:

And marriage for many reasons.

440

:

It allows you to feel close,

understood, and valued by each other.

441

:

It is also key for maintaining

teamwork, reconciliation.

442

:

Spiritual and sexual intimacy

and for finding joy in

443

:

marriage, it's so important.

444

:

So that's, yeah, I mean, I mean,

honestly, like if you think about

445

:

emotional intimacy, I feel like

that's when people experience

446

:

love, that's what they're mostly

experiencing is that form of intimacy.

447

:

There's obviously five different types of

intimacy, but when you experience like the

448

:

feeling of falling in love, it's typically

in this emotional intimacy category.

449

:

And it's also from what this

definition, from this retreat book

450

:

is giving us, it's the key for

maintaining teamwork, reconciliation,

451

:

spiritual, and sexual intimacy,

and for fighting joy in marriage.

452

:

So it's almost like the bedrock, it's

like the glue, like the foundation

453

:

that then can hold all the other stuff.

454

:

Yeah.

455

:

Because if you, you're not, if you

don't have emotional intimacy, then

456

:

uh, spiritual intimacy will be really

hard because it's very vulnerable.

457

:

Vulnerable.

458

:

And then sexual intimacy is very hard.

459

:

As well.

460

:

Um, so yeah, I can, it's very important.

461

:

Yeah, I was thinking about it as like

the glue that holds everything together,

462

:

or like you said, the foundation

that the house is built upon, like

463

:

that needs to be rock solid for the

other ones to also be able to thrive.

464

:

m-t_11_10-29-2025_121501: Okay.

465

:

So how have we tried to grow

in and strengthen emotional

466

:

unity in our marriage?

467

:

Well, I'd say you, Mari

are really good at this.

468

:

I think this is like your strength.

469

:

Oh, thank you.

470

:

And tell me how, so you'll like.

471

:

Like, there'll be moments where like

you are just craving emotional intimacy,

472

:

and so you'll like put everything away.

473

:

You'll like put your phone down or you'll

put your food down, or whatever you're

474

:

working on or whatever you're doing.

475

:

You'll like close the laptop and

you'll just like scoot up really

476

:

close to me and just like need

to have physical contact with it.

477

:

And either hold my hands, hold your hands,

or put your hands, my hands on your legs,

478

:

or, yeah, and then just like stare into

my eyes and be like, okay, let's connect.

479

:

Like, how are you?

480

:

Or Tell me how you're feeling.

481

:

Yeah.

482

:

Like tell me your emotions.

483

:

What do you feel right now?

484

:

I do ask you that a lot where

I'm like, tell me how you feel.

485

:

Yeah.

486

:

And then sometimes I'll like

do some follow up questions.

487

:

'cause I feel like, and correct

me if I'm wrong, maybe it's you or

488

:

maybe it's men in general, have a

harder time, like pinpointing what

489

:

a feeling is called or what they're

feeling like putting words to that.

490

:

Right.

491

:

So just asking how you feel.

492

:

Sometimes as a wife, you just

kinda get the answer like, good.

493

:

Yeah, I'm, I'm great.

494

:

You know, or like I told you

how I feel, it's all great.

495

:

Mm-hmm.

496

:

Or like, you know, it's

like, oh, I don't know.

497

:

I'm, I'm just stressed.

498

:

I don't know.

499

:

And there's only like one

word attached to it, right?

500

:

Yep.

501

:

And so sometimes I try and like do some

follow up questions to kind of dig deeper.

502

:

Yeah.

503

:

I prod your questions, not

prodding, just, but yeah.

504

:

Like, I'm just, I just want lovingly,

lovingly learning more about what

505

:

you're feeling internally, because I

think the more open we can be with our

506

:

spouse of how we're doing internally,

the more understanding and compassion

507

:

we have for our spouse, the more

we understand their behavior, where

508

:

they're coming from, what their needs

are, how we can support and love them.

509

:

Yeah.

510

:

Which is what we wanna do.

511

:

Of course.

512

:

And then also there's times where.

513

:

If it feels like, wow, it's been

a few days, or it's been a week of

514

:

just feeling, feeling a little bit

distant from each other, like we're

515

:

just not connecting, then we'll just

be like, okay, it is time for a date.

516

:

We gotta, we need a date night.

517

:

So then we'll go out to dinner and just

like make sure we put everything away

518

:

and just talk, talk and try to reconnect.

519

:

So, yeah.

520

:

And emotional intimacy, what it

is, is it's, it's vulnerability

521

:

without the fear of rejection.

522

:

And so, uh, I just think back to like the.

523

:

Uh, the Garden of Eden, where mm-hmm.

524

:

There's like the shame, like sin enters

the world and shame enters the world.

525

:

Um, and there's that like,

there's that fear of rejection.

526

:

There's that fear of like needing to

cover yourself and protect yourself.

527

:

Uh, so emotional intimacy,

it's like the opposite of that.

528

:

It's that, uh, true vulnerability with

your spouse without the fear of rejection.

529

:

, And it's just ultimately

being seen and know.

530

:

And just safe with your spouse.

531

:

Yeah.

532

:

And another thing that comes to mind

is like, it's about sharing truly like

533

:

your inner world, not just updates that

could easily be shared with anybody

534

:

or seen from anybody on the outside.

535

:

So.

536

:

Often when you ask someone

like, how are you doing?

537

:

You get a response of what they did

that day or like what they've been up to

538

:

versus like, we wanna respond, like how

are we actually emotionally, what have we

539

:

experienced interiorly that day or that

week or that month, whenever it's being

540

:

asked, because that is a window into.

541

:

Yeah, our interior world, which is

important to share that with our spouse.

542

:

Yep.

543

:

So an exercise that we learned to

be able to practice this well is a

544

:

sharing and a listening exercise.

545

:

And this works for.

546

:

Multiple scenarios for just having

good conversation and learning how

547

:

to share emotions and feelings, and

learning how to be a good listener.

548

:

Also, really works for moments of

conflict when you need to discuss

549

:

something and you really wanna make sure

that you're being understood and you're

550

:

seeking to understand your partner.

551

:

I would say not just conflict, like yes,

it is a very good tool for conflict.

552

:

It's also a really good tool.

553

:

Just for like important conversations.

554

:

Yeah.

555

:

Like, or when you're trying to

make a decision or work through an

556

:

important, um, problem or issue.

557

:

Yeah.

558

:

And I'll just say like trust the process.

559

:

Like at first you might be

like, really is that necessary?

560

:

But like we've done it

and it's really helpful.

561

:

So basically one person goes first, let's

say the wife goes first and she shares

562

:

for like five minutes and she shares

her thoughts on the matter or concerns

563

:

that she have, shares her emotions.

564

:

She gets to talk for five minutes.

565

:

Maybe she's sharing something joyful

and she just wants to express something

566

:

right, like she shares for five minutes

and the husband's role is to be a

567

:

listener and he's actively listening.

568

:

He's making eye contact.

569

:

Body language is so important for,

active listening and making sure that.

570

:

Like the two people feel like

actually connected and engaged.

571

:

So he's like making eye contact,

nodding, not distracted.

572

:

Right.

573

:

And then when she's done, he kind

of reflects back what she said to

574

:

him to validate what she has shared

as well as like clarify anything

575

:

in case he heard something wrong.

576

:

Right.

577

:

What you can do is like,

oh, that's amazing.

578

:

Right?

579

:

Like add some validation.

580

:

Thanks so much for sharing, it sounds

like, and then you kind of repeat back

581

:

a summary or what I heard you say, or

what I understood you to say is this, and

582

:

this is really helpful because one gives.

583

:

In this case, Mari or the wife, like the

validation that she's being understood.

584

:

And heard.

585

:

And heard.

586

:

And then two, it also gives the

chance for re clarification if

587

:

there was a miscommunication.

588

:

Yeah.

589

:

'cause so often, like the little

fights and arguments are all

590

:

just because of miscommunication.

591

:

Mm-hmm.

592

:

And so if I say what I understood you to

say is this, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

593

:

And then there was something that I

understood her to say that was incorrect.

594

:

Then Mari can respond like, oh

yes, like that was all right.

595

:

But that one little part here, like,

that's not actually what I meant.

596

:

Here's another way for

me to say it, to clarify.

597

:

Mm-hmm.

598

:

What it's that I meant, and

basically when you're doing it in the

599

:

context of an a conflict or a hard

discussion or something like that.

600

:

You're technically supposed to keep going

until what the other person, the listening

601

:

person has reflected back is accurate.

602

:

Like if the person who spoke is like,

that's not actually what I said.

603

:

She gets a chance to like reiterate

what she said and then he reflects

604

:

back, okay, so is it this right?

605

:

And then once.

606

:

It's actually accurate,

then you're able to move on.

607

:

And that way both parties feel

like, I actually understand

608

:

and I am being understood.

609

:

Yeah.

610

:

Um, obstacles though, to doing this, to

connecting on an emotional level deeply.

611

:

It's gonna be wounds and bitterness,

and this is just part of life.

612

:

We all have wounds.

613

:

We all have ways that we have

been hurt in the past or even

614

:

hurt each other and our spouses.

615

:

And I think that's something that you, you

learn really quick as a married couple.

616

:

Like you think that you're never gonna

hurt each other because of course,

617

:

like your intention is not to hurt

each other, but because we're broken

618

:

and we're human like we do, mm-hmm.

619

:

We hurt each other, we ruin each other.

620

:

Things that we say or do have

a lasting impact on our spouse.

621

:

And these can be obstacles to

connecting on emotional unity because

622

:

it breaks trust in a sense, right?

623

:

It breaks trust and safety that you can

actually be so vulnerable and open up

624

:

in an emotional sense to your partner.

625

:

So.

626

:

Ways to kind of repair this that we

learned is expressing and listening,

627

:

which it's kind of like an interesting

cycle 'cause it's like you don't

628

:

wanna express and listen because

you've been hurt and you're bitter.

629

:

And often those things have been unspoken.

630

:

But then the anecdote to that is you

actually have to express and listen.

631

:

So my advice I think would be to like

start small and work your way up.

632

:

Don't start by sharing like.

633

:

The, the biggest thing that you've held

onto for like a, a long time and haven't

634

:

been able to share or your biggest

argument, but start off with like.

635

:

Sharing something joyful or like happy or

something that you've enjoyed recently?

636

:

Start by sharing something like

positive or maybe emotionally neutral.

637

:

Yeah.

638

:

And practicing that back and forth.

639

:

And then moving on to harder topics

over time or over the conversation.

640

:

And the more that you do that, the

more you build up emotional unity and

641

:

intimacy, because the more trust is being

built, the more safety is being built.

642

:

Mm-hmm.

643

:

When you're sharing your

feelings and emotion.

644

:

You're being listened to, received,

not judged, validated, and then

645

:

reflect back what you heard.

646

:

You're gonna slowly build up that trust.

647

:

Yeah.

648

:

Yeah.

649

:

And so that just puts a lot of emphasis

like the two, antidotes to the obstacles

650

:

for this is listening and expressing.

651

:

And so that puts a lot of

importance on the listener, like

652

:

the person receiving and what

their like body language is during.

653

:

The time that the person's expressing

and the way that they can show that

654

:

they understood the other person.

655

:

And just like the act of listening and

then like the gentleness that follows.

656

:

Mm.

657

:

Receiving the person who's sharing

like that, I think most of the emphasis

658

:

needs to be put on the listener.

659

:

Mm-hmm.

660

:

Um, yes.

661

:

You have to.

662

:

Go out in faith and like be brave

sometimes and share hard things.

663

:

Mm-hmm.

664

:

Uh, and be the person that's like

expressing and sharing things that

665

:

might be a little bit scary to share,

but I think the brunt of the weight

666

:

needs to be put on the receiver and.

667

:

Like the way you can cultivate emotional

intimacy is by receiving well, and that

668

:

means listening well, and that means

being gentle and receiving the other

669

:

Well, yeah, and I think that that's

something that I've had to work on too,

670

:

is like receiving versus reacting because

it's so easy, especially if you're

671

:

someone with a stronger personality

or you're very decisive or you don't

672

:

struggle with what to say, right?

673

:

You don't, you never have a

lack of words, like mm-hmm.

674

:

You immediately have a

reaction to something and.

675

:

You're so right that to build that trust

and emotional unity like you need to be

676

:

received when you do share those things.

677

:

And so really shifting our mindset from

like receiving our spouse, reflecting

678

:

back to them so that they're understood

and then sharing a reaction that is so

679

:

helpful to build up that relationship.

680

:

Last thing I would say is that going

back to the wounds and bitterness.

681

:

Another anecdote to that is

just gonna be forgiveness.

682

:

Constant forgiveness.

683

:

Yes.

684

:

Mm-hmm.

685

:

Forgiveness is really hard, and asking

for forgiveness is hard and apologizing.

686

:

It's really hard.

687

:

And so the more we can do that, like on a

daily basis, not even just waiting for the

688

:

really big thing, but on a daily basis, I

feel like we try and practice that a lot.

689

:

You know, we don't let little

things build up or just kind

690

:

of shove 'em under the rug.

691

:

Like if one of us is like.

692

:

Of not talking to each other in the nicest

tone, like you'll be able to tell, right?

693

:

And the other person will kind of

say something about it and the hope

694

:

is that we would be able to grow and

increase our ability to like ask for

695

:

forgiveness and apologize and forgive

frequently for little things throughout

696

:

our day so that then when the big

things come around, we already have

697

:

that foundation, that trust buildup

of like, we apologize and we forgive.

698

:

Yep.

699

:

That's huge.

700

:

All right, next.

701

:

All right.

702

:

Number three, okay.

703

:

Next is companionship and I, I love

this one because it reminds me of.

704

:

In the Garden of Eden, when

the Lord said it is not good

705

:

for the man to be alone, right?

706

:

Like he created a helper, a companion,

a partner for Adam to do life with.

707

:

And so this is a super

important part of marriage.

708

:

Um, and one of God's purposes in

creating marriage is companionship.

709

:

He wanted us to have partnerships, someone

to share life with, companionship is

710

:

spending time together in our work and

especially in recreation, to strengthen

711

:

the bonds of unity in marriage.

712

:

So this is like having common goals

that you are working towards together,

713

:

I feel like, and it can be both.

714

:

Like it was saying work or

recreation because it mm-hmm.

715

:

It provides opportunities for you to

do things together, like recreational

716

:

things together, um, where you are.

717

:

Yeah.

718

:

Sharing a common goal.

719

:

I think so often in marriage we

have a unique situation 'cause

720

:

we work together and we live

together and we have the same job.

721

:

Right?

722

:

Yeah.

723

:

But most.

724

:

Marriages, we know most friends that

we know, um, husband goes off to work.

725

:

Maybe the wife also works or she's

at home, and then they have separate

726

:

interests or separate activities.

727

:

Mm-hmm.

728

:

And that's not bad at all.

729

:

I mean, that's great.

730

:

Right.

731

:

But there are a lot of opportunities

to do things separately or to engage

732

:

in different interests separately.

733

:

Mm-hmm.

734

:

Strengthening your companionship

of marriage is going to be doing

735

:

things together to strengthen

friendship as the core of your

736

:

marriage so that you're enjoying.

737

:

Life together.

738

:

You're not just coexisting

together under the same roof.

739

:

So that's having moments of shared

joy, of play, of laughter, of

740

:

working towards something together.

741

:

And I feel like friendship is something

that we focus so much in our dating years,

742

:

and maybe even engagement, but then can

be a little bit more lost in marriage.

743

:

Yeah.

744

:

But really strengthening that friendship

aspect of marriage is going to make your

745

:

marriage so much stronger and going to

bring so much joy to your relationship.

746

:

Yeah.

747

:

And so.

748

:

What I would say is I feel like

there's that fear that we probably

749

:

have all seen, uh, or know couples

that are like this or we're afraid

750

:

of becoming this in our later years.

751

:

But like that saying like, we're

just ships passing in the night.

752

:

Mm-hmm.

753

:

And I that like your work, like Yeah.

754

:

Most couples don't work together.

755

:

But the work you could classify work

as the, like, running the household

756

:

operation, like getting the kids to

school, getting them fed, getting

757

:

the groceries done, getting uh,

them to all their extracurricular

758

:

activities, uh, like planning the, you

know, double dates with your friends

759

:

or like, whatever the outings are.

760

:

Like, there's a lot of like life that is

happening that's just like maintenance.

761

:

Um.

762

:

That is just kinda like the

requirement to just keep up on life.

763

:

And that can also like be

classified just as like work.

764

:

And you can, you can do all that

together, which is good, but it's like

765

:

if that's all you're doing together

and not doing the recreational stuff,

766

:

then it's like you're only doing the

work together and you're not doing the

767

:

recreational, so then you're not having

true companionship is what I would say.

768

:

And so then like that's how

you become, you know, to.

769

:

People living two separate lives,

just living under the same roof.

770

:

And like, that's not what anybody wants.

771

:

That's, you don't get, you don't go

into marriage with the desire to be

772

:

like, I wanna live my own life just

under the same roof as somebody else.

773

:

Right.

774

:

No.

775

:

Right.

776

:

So, yeah.

777

:

So I think the, the, the thing

that really strengthens this is

778

:

that recreational companionship.

779

:

Yeah.

780

:

And so what we're taught and

from this retreat is that the

781

:

obstacles to companionship

are isolation and selfishness.

782

:

And so I think that what that is

is it, is what I was just saying

783

:

about like living separate lives.

784

:

Mm-hmm.

785

:

Like you just wanna do

what you want to do.

786

:

And it's more, it's maybe it's

easier just to do it by yourself

787

:

than to invite your spouse into it.

788

:

Mm-hmm.

789

:

And so, or you are feeling

maybe a little bit emotionally

790

:

disconnected from your spouse.

791

:

And so just you choose to isolate.

792

:

You just choose to isolate.

793

:

And so the, like, the choice of.

794

:

Isolation or the selfishness of like,

yeah, I know, like Mari's inviting

795

:

me to, uh, join her to watch a show

with you, to watch a show with her,

796

:

but I don't like that show, so I'm

just gonna go watch my show upstairs.

797

:

Mm-hmm.

798

:

Like that, like choosing that

selfish or that isolating activity

799

:

instead of, uh, that companionship.

800

:

Mm, yeah.

801

:

Choosing moments to do things together.

802

:

Yep.

803

:

So that, those are the obstacles.

804

:

Do you want to share what the.

805

:

Solution is.

806

:

Yeah, so a solution I think would

be to find moments of recreational

807

:

connection together or activities

that you can do together in a way

808

:

to kind of explore what those are.

809

:

Have, you know, one, one spouse go

first and share different moments

810

:

that they have really enjoyed

doing something together with you.

811

:

And then the other spouse will share that.

812

:

Right?

813

:

And you kind of practice that

same like listening, reflecting,

814

:

kind of that whole thing to have

a good conversation about it.

815

:

But you both kind of reflect on, these

are moments when I really enjoy doing

816

:

this activity with you or doing this.

817

:

You know, working on this together

with you other spouse shares.

818

:

And then you see if there's any

commonalities or common ground,

819

:

maybe common memories that

you had that you both enjoyed.

820

:

Um, and then you can also just discuss

like, okay, moving forward, what is

821

:

something that we can work on together?

822

:

Or what are moments of recreational

activities that we could do together?

823

:

One way that I've specifically tried

to lean into this, into marriage is by.

824

:

Learning to play golf with you?

825

:

Yes.

826

:

Like once I realized how important

golf was to you in your life when

827

:

you, and how much time that you could

be spending with me that you weren't

828

:

spending with me because I was golfing.

829

:

Yes.

830

:

I was like, I need to learn to love

golf if I want to spend more time with

831

:

my husband, which is hilarious 'cause

we already spend so much time together.

832

:

But.

833

:

No, honestly, it was because I wanted

to do something recreational together.

834

:

Mm-hmm.

835

:

And I know like sports is something

that you love, but it's not something

836

:

that I really love and like this was a

sport that I felt like I could possibly

837

:

get into and I could be open to.

838

:

Yeah.

839

:

You wear a cute outfit,

you drive a golf cart.

840

:

And you, you, you were,

the outfit was the gateway.

841

:

And you, I'll say that.

842

:

You get to like, just go out and

hang out with your spouse in nature

843

:

without like being around other people.

844

:

It is, it's so fun.

845

:

It's so beautiful.

846

:

And so I was like, I am

gonna learn to love golf.

847

:

And slowly I did that.

848

:

Over time.

849

:

I started out with just like riding

the cart when he went to go play

850

:

golf, I'd be like, can I ride along?

851

:

He'd be like, oh my

gosh, that'd be so fun.

852

:

I'd bring some drinks or something.

853

:

We would just like.

854

:

Chat and he would play golf and then I'd

like take a couple shots here and there.

855

:

And he like kind of taught

me how to swing the club.

856

:

And then eventually I was like,

okay, like let me like play a couple

857

:

holes or a couple of shots in a hole.

858

:

And then slowly over time that would

build up and build upon itself.

859

:

And now I'm playing like

nine holes, you know?

860

:

And it's like super fun that we get to.

861

:

Do this together.

862

:

It's a recreational activity

that gets us outta the house.

863

:

It gets us moving, it gets

us like disconnected just

864

:

from like our daily grind.

865

:

Yep.

866

:

Gets us out in nature and we

can connect on something like

867

:

an activity that we both enjoy.

868

:

Yeah.

869

:

That builds up our friendship.

870

:

Yep.

871

:

So that, that's a great

example that Mari did.

872

:

You could also just do like the little

things that happen in everyday life.

873

:

You can just do 'em together.

874

:

So whether it's cooking or.

875

:

Cleaning or, you know,

drinking your coffee together.

876

:

Mm-hmm.

877

:

Uh, but like, just doing those things

like that are a part of just daily

878

:

life, but doing them together Yeah.

879

:

Can make a big difference as opposed

to just like, Hey, you cook, I'm

880

:

gonna go upstairs and be by myself.

881

:

You know what I mean?

882

:

Yeah.

883

:

And I think companionship really

just keeps marriage young.

884

:

Like I hope that we like can keep

this like young kind of dating energy

885

:

alive for like as long as possible.

886

:

Yeah.

887

:

Or like throughout our

whole marriage, of course.

888

:

And I want our kids and people from

the outside to look and be like.

889

:

They're just a bunch of GI kids, like

they're just a bunch of goofballs.

890

:

You know, like why are they always

like smiling and laughing and like

891

:

doing all these fun things together?

892

:

Yeah.

893

:

Like I want that like friendship and

youthfulness to kind of stay alive.

894

:

And I think these activities and

really leaning into companionship

895

:

is a way to accomplish that.

896

:

Yep.

897

:

All right, number four is teamwork.

898

:

Okay.

899

:

Trey, what do we got?

900

:

Teamwork The definition we have here is

submit to one another out of Reverence

901

:

for Christ Practice mutual submission.

902

:

Teamwork is really about

entering into this shared.

903

:

Mission of marriage together and

recognizing that there are two people

904

:

in this relationship and that your

job is to get each other to heaven

905

:

and your job is to be able to work

together to have a good marriage to, you

906

:

know, possibly raise children and to.

907

:

Get them and your spouse to heaven.

908

:

And so much of marriage is

working together, not just in like

909

:

things that we just talked about.

910

:

Were like a shared goal, but it's

really about like building your life

911

:

together and doing life together,

and there's obstacles that come along

912

:

and you have to face them together.

913

:

There's discussion or disagreements

and you have to work on that together.

914

:

There's need for compromise and

there's two sides that need to be

915

:

willing to compromise and understand

and let go of things and take things

916

:

on to be able to have a successful

and strong marriage moving forward.

917

:

I think to understand teamwork and

like how teamwork is a level of, or

918

:

an area of communion within marriage.

919

:

Mm-hmm.

920

:

It's.

921

:

It's helpful to see

what the obstacles are.

922

:

Yeah, so the obstacles, the teamwork

are stubbornness and control, and so.

923

:

Obviously if you're experiencing

stubbornness and controlling on

924

:

either end of the marriage, that's

going to create like separation

925

:

and it's gonna create disunity.

926

:

And so the solution here

is mutual submission.

927

:

when there is mutual submission

to each other, that shows.

928

:

A level of respect.

929

:

Mm-hmm.

930

:

And it creates a environment for freedom.

931

:

Um, and whereas when there are

stubbornness and control, then

932

:

that creates, a lack of freedom

and love, like love cannot flourish

933

:

when there is a lack of freedom.

934

:

Love can only flourish within

an environment of freedom.

935

:

And when there's control and

stubbornness going on, then that

936

:

will prevent love from happening.

937

:

And so that's like, I think like

seeing the, the obstacles and.

938

:

The solution to those obstacles

helps understand like how teamwork

939

:

is an area of communion and how

important that is in the marriage.

940

:

Yeah.

941

:

And like leading and yielding to

each other are both forms of love.

942

:

Yeah.

943

:

And both forms of teamwork.

944

:

And truly, it's such a selfless

mindset when you really lean into

945

:

teamwork because you're choosing.

946

:

To understand the other person.

947

:

You're choosing humility,

you're choosing, yeah.

948

:

To let go of control and to not

be stubborn and to not just do

949

:

things your way over, like winning

and making your way the best way

950

:

that needs to be moving forward.

951

:

Yeah, and I think this word mutual

submission can kind of, maybe.

952

:

Feel weird in people's

mouths or in their brains.

953

:

Um, and the, what that means in

like this biblical context, in

954

:

this Christian context mm-hmm.

955

:

Is submission is self-gift and

it's like radical self-gift.

956

:

And so it's not this like power

imbalance and like one person has

957

:

more power than the other person.

958

:

Yeah.

959

:

But it's this mutual self-giving of each

other, like for the good of the other.

960

:

And that's love.

961

:

Yeah.

962

:

So that's so good.

963

:

So.

964

:

Ways to overcome this obstacle

or to bridge that gap of

965

:

teamwork in your marriage.

966

:

Is to enter into a discussion over

something that has been maybe a

967

:

disagreement or something that you

haven't been able to come to an

968

:

agreement on for a decision that

you need to make in your marriage.

969

:

So I would recommend like building

upon the other types of unity

970

:

before you kind of go into this.

971

:

Because I feel like that's

important to lay a foundation.

972

:

Definitely.

973

:

Um, but I remember when we did this in

the marriage retreat, we were talking

974

:

about you quitting your job and going

full-time with West Coast Catholic.

975

:

That's right.

976

:

And at the time I had fears about

us being like financially prepared

977

:

for that or the timing being right.

978

:

Mm-hmm.

979

:

And you wanted to take that leap

to jump into work for West Coast

980

:

Catholic and close the chapter of

your full-time like corporate job.

981

:

Job.

982

:

Yep.

983

:

And so it's, it's similar to the exercises

we've done before where one person

984

:

shares their thoughts, their concerns,

and the other person listens and repeats

985

:

back and you continue to refine and

then the other person goes, then , he

986

:

shares his thoughts, his concerns.

987

:

You repeat back, you

absorb that, and then.

988

:

The goal in this conversation is to

get closer to making a decision and

989

:

to learning where can each of us like

mutually submit to each other to be

990

:

able to move forward with a decision.

991

:

And it's about compromise Yeah.

992

:

There's like the key,

is a mutual submission.

993

:

Um, because there's, it's like you

said, you said, you said it perfectly.

994

:

Like it's not about trying to

overpower the other one and convince

995

:

them that your way is better.

996

:

It's about, it's the submission,

like what I said is it's self-gift.

997

:

It's sacrificing what you desire

because you realize, because you love

998

:

the other person and you see what they

desire and you want them to have that.

999

:

And so there's like, if you both are doing

that, then you can find places for that.

:

00:45:41,564 --> 00:45:43,454

Like really beautiful compromise.

:

00:45:43,454 --> 00:45:45,764

Or even, it could not even be compromised.

:

00:45:45,764 --> 00:45:51,074

It could just be like a true act

of submission, not because the one

:

00:45:51,074 --> 00:45:54,974

person won the argument and they like

outwitted the other person and proved

:

00:45:54,974 --> 00:45:56,024

to them that their way was better.

:

00:45:56,024 --> 00:45:59,654

But because the other person, like in

their freedom, chose, Hey, I actually,

:

00:45:59,654 --> 00:46:04,034

after hearing you out and hearing

all your desire, like and willing

:

00:46:04,034 --> 00:46:07,124

to sacrifice what I want because

I want you to have what you want.

:

00:46:07,129 --> 00:46:07,309

Yeah.

:

00:46:07,409 --> 00:46:08,024

So, yeah.

:

00:46:08,024 --> 00:46:08,534

That's so true.

:

00:46:08,534 --> 00:46:08,924

There's both.

:

00:46:09,014 --> 00:46:09,584

That's so true.

:

00:46:09,704 --> 00:46:09,914

Yeah.

:

00:46:10,469 --> 00:46:14,519

And one final thought with this, uh,

activity, or I guess two short ones.

:

00:46:14,519 --> 00:46:18,179

One, start with something small that's

like not a really big, big deal.

:

00:46:18,179 --> 00:46:18,389

Yeah.

:

00:46:18,899 --> 00:46:19,619

And practice it.

:

00:46:19,799 --> 00:46:23,459

But then two, invite like

lean on the spiritual unity as

:

00:46:23,459 --> 00:46:25,559

well and invite God into it.

:

00:46:25,559 --> 00:46:29,969

And so like in prayer, you like

the husband should submit his will

:

00:46:29,999 --> 00:46:33,599

to God, to God's will the wife

should in prayer, like together,

:

00:46:33,809 --> 00:46:35,519

submit her will to the will of God.

:

00:46:35,519 --> 00:46:40,019

And ultimately, like what you're trying

to do together is do the will of God.

:

00:46:40,024 --> 00:46:40,204

Mm-hmm.

:

00:46:40,559 --> 00:46:41,604

In your marriage and in your lives.

:

00:46:41,604 --> 00:46:41,964

Mm-hmm.

:

00:46:42,089 --> 00:46:47,429

And so there's submission happening to

each other out of love, but there's also

:

00:46:47,549 --> 00:46:50,549

the submission to God and to his will.

:

00:46:51,059 --> 00:46:51,449

Mm-hmm.

:

00:46:51,866 --> 00:46:52,226

Okay.

:

00:46:52,226 --> 00:46:56,216

The last marital communion aspect

we're gonna touch on is sexual

:

00:46:56,216 --> 00:47:00,356

intimacy, and I love this definition

that they have here in the workbook.

:

00:47:00,926 --> 00:47:07,436

Love is a free, total, faithful

and fruitful gift of yourself.

:

00:47:07,466 --> 00:47:13,196

And sexual intimacy in order to be

loving, needs to express all of these

:

00:47:13,196 --> 00:47:19,919

areas Sexual intimacy is truly just

this bodily physical expression of total

:

00:47:19,919 --> 00:47:24,719

gift of self and on a spiritual level

because there's, there's physical and

:

00:47:24,719 --> 00:47:26,579

there's spiritual and emotional level.

:

00:47:26,819 --> 00:47:32,909

In sexual intimacy, it's a renewal of

your wedding vows through the language of.

:

00:47:33,524 --> 00:47:34,454

Your body.

:

00:47:34,784 --> 00:47:39,554

And so that's one of the reasons

why sex is so sacred and should be

:

00:47:39,554 --> 00:47:44,024

reserved within the context of marriage

because it is making these wedding

:

00:47:44,024 --> 00:47:47,144

vows to that person physically.

:

00:47:47,324 --> 00:47:51,944

So like what you say on the altar at

your wedding is being renewed and made

:

00:47:51,944 --> 00:47:55,664

promises to each other every time you

come together in the marital act as well.

:

00:47:55,964 --> 00:47:56,804

And so really that.

:

00:47:56,804 --> 00:48:01,604

Sexual unity is going to integrate

so many different aspects, physical

:

00:48:01,604 --> 00:48:05,984

communion, spiritual emotional,

communion, um, and I feel like is

:

00:48:05,984 --> 00:48:08,354

also like the glue in your marriage.

:

00:48:08,359 --> 00:48:08,649

Yeah.

:

00:48:09,434 --> 00:48:09,614

Okay.

:

00:48:09,614 --> 00:48:11,264

So if we look at the.

:

00:48:11,557 --> 00:48:12,487

Definition of love.

:

00:48:12,487 --> 00:48:16,297

Love is a free, total, faithful

and fruitful gifts of yourself.

:

00:48:16,987 --> 00:48:18,337

So free, obviously.

:

00:48:18,667 --> 00:48:21,637

Uh, for sexual intimacy to

occur, there has to be freedom.

:

00:48:21,997 --> 00:48:23,317

I think that's obvious total.

:

00:48:24,397 --> 00:48:26,407

Is giving the total gift of yourself.

:

00:48:26,407 --> 00:48:30,067

And so that's like Mario, what Mario

was saying, uh, this renewal of

:

00:48:30,067 --> 00:48:36,037

your wedding bs, um, and giving your

entire self and not withholding back.

:

00:48:36,067 --> 00:48:36,157

Mm-hmm.

:

00:48:36,487 --> 00:48:40,627

And then faithful, uh, this means

like, don't be adulterous, don't be

:

00:48:40,627 --> 00:48:44,317

like sleeping around with a bunch

of people, but be faithful to just

:

00:48:44,317 --> 00:48:47,467

your spouse and then fruitful that.

:

00:48:47,947 --> 00:48:52,027

Uh, like true love in its

purest form brings forth life.

:

00:48:52,237 --> 00:48:56,587

And so in the physical way, when you're

like connecting and expressing love

:

00:48:56,587 --> 00:49:02,137

physically through the marital act, that

is being open to what comes from that

:

00:49:02,137 --> 00:49:04,387

and that love and that bearing life.

:

00:49:04,387 --> 00:49:08,077

And so being, uh, sexual love, being

fruitful is being open to life.

:

00:49:08,527 --> 00:49:08,767

Yeah.

:

00:49:08,767 --> 00:49:11,917

And I, and I've also heard it

being talked about, about how,

:

00:49:11,917 --> 00:49:14,467

like life in more ways than one.

:

00:49:14,467 --> 00:49:15,727

Like, for.

:

00:49:15,727 --> 00:49:18,007

The marital act to be fruitful.

:

00:49:18,501 --> 00:49:22,641

It also is like bringing life into

your marriage and your relationship,

:

00:49:23,031 --> 00:49:27,231

and it helps to do that as

well as obviously biologically.

:

00:49:27,291 --> 00:49:27,561

Yep.

:

00:49:27,621 --> 00:49:33,141

What happens is hopefully a child

comes from that, so obstacles to sexual

:

00:49:33,141 --> 00:49:36,171

intimacy, lust, and insensitivity.

:

00:49:36,516 --> 00:49:40,836

So obviously, uh, lust is, if

you're looking at the like,

:

00:49:40,836 --> 00:49:45,546

virtues and vices, like the virtue

is love and the vice is lust.

:

00:49:45,546 --> 00:49:46,566

It's on the other side.

:

00:49:46,836 --> 00:49:51,496

And so lust, what that incorporates

is , it's, instead of it being

:

00:49:51,496 --> 00:49:54,136

self-gift, it's like selfish.

:

00:49:54,466 --> 00:49:58,506

It's basically like a distorted view

of love because it's selfish and , it's

:

00:49:58,506 --> 00:50:03,546

self-focused as opposed to self-giving,

and it's using instead of giving.

:

00:50:03,551 --> 00:50:03,631

Yeah.

:

00:50:04,181 --> 00:50:05,621

And then insensitivity.

:

00:50:05,981 --> 00:50:10,991

I would say that like insensitivity

harms the level of like vulnerability

:

00:50:10,991 --> 00:50:15,911

you're able to have within sex because

it is such a vulnerable opportunity

:

00:50:15,911 --> 00:50:19,871

in your marriage and you need to

be like sensitive to the need.

:

00:50:20,456 --> 00:50:21,686

Of your spouse.

:

00:50:21,746 --> 00:50:21,866

Yeah.

:

00:50:22,316 --> 00:50:27,476

And if you are insensitive or apathetic

or judgmental, that's going to

:

00:50:27,476 --> 00:50:31,766

close the other person off and not

make them feel like they can give

:

00:50:31,766 --> 00:50:33,236

that total gift of self or true.

:

00:50:33,236 --> 00:50:35,606

Free to to love completely.

:

00:50:35,606 --> 00:50:38,486

Because there's fear of judgment or Yeah.

:

00:50:38,636 --> 00:50:40,256

Harshness, right?

:

00:50:40,256 --> 00:50:44,756

Like there needs to be a tenderness

to the needs of the other person.

:

00:50:44,816 --> 00:50:44,966

Mm-hmm.

:

00:50:45,206 --> 00:50:45,296

Yeah.

:

00:50:45,296 --> 00:50:48,026

So insensitivity like prevents.

:

00:50:48,671 --> 00:50:50,711

That free and total.

:

00:50:51,341 --> 00:50:52,481

Uh, aspects of love.

:

00:50:52,631 --> 00:50:52,721

Mm-hmm.

:

00:50:53,261 --> 00:50:57,341

And then the solutions, uh,

is affection and love making.

:

00:50:57,341 --> 00:50:59,681

So obviously love making,

uh, we all know that.

:

00:50:59,681 --> 00:51:02,081

But affection, I think this is really

important because super important.

:

00:51:02,411 --> 00:51:04,991

Um, do you wanna use

your crockpot analogy?

:

00:51:05,921 --> 00:51:07,241

I think that was their analogy.

:

00:51:07,246 --> 00:51:07,696

Was that their analogy?

:

00:51:07,696 --> 00:51:08,651

That was their analogy.

:

00:51:08,651 --> 00:51:09,431

That wasn't me.

:

00:51:09,821 --> 00:51:13,181

They shared that at the retreat,

but they talked about how like men

:

00:51:13,181 --> 00:51:16,901

are like instant pots, like they're

ready in an instant at any instant.

:

00:51:17,261 --> 00:51:19,811

And women are like crock pots, like.

:

00:51:20,681 --> 00:51:24,821

Hours for us to like simmer

and like to be ready, right?

:

00:51:24,821 --> 00:51:24,911

Yep.

:

00:51:25,181 --> 00:51:29,501

And so one thing I've heard that

I think is brilliant is that like

:

00:51:29,501 --> 00:51:32,921

sex starts outside of the bedroom,

like way before nighttime, right?

:

00:51:32,921 --> 00:51:37,181

Like you set your spouse up for

success and this especially goes

:

00:51:37,421 --> 00:51:39,761

for like men towards their wives.

:

00:51:39,821 --> 00:51:39,881

Yeah.

:

00:51:40,211 --> 00:51:42,131

Um, kind of like, yeah.

:

00:51:42,131 --> 00:51:45,101

Being affectionate and loving her

outside the bedroom throughout

:

00:51:45,101 --> 00:51:46,751

the day is going to make for.

:

00:51:47,381 --> 00:51:48,941

A great bedroom experience.

:

00:51:48,971 --> 00:51:49,301

Yeah.

:

00:51:49,631 --> 00:51:53,471

And so it's, it's being

affectionate throughout the day.

:

00:51:53,471 --> 00:51:56,591

Like when she's in the kitchen

doing dishes, like going up

:

00:51:56,591 --> 00:51:57,311

behind her and hugging her.

:

00:51:57,311 --> 00:52:00,731

Or if, like, if you're gone from the

day and you get home, like dropping

:

00:52:00,731 --> 00:52:03,071

everything and going, going and

like embracing her wife, giving

:

00:52:03,071 --> 00:52:04,301

her a kiss and like saying hello.

:

00:52:04,391 --> 00:52:04,481

Mm-hmm.

:

00:52:04,781 --> 00:52:08,291

Um, or it's just like holding

her hand or like putting your

:

00:52:08,291 --> 00:52:09,941

hand on the my back on her.

:

00:52:10,616 --> 00:52:12,456

Shoulders are on her back, um mm-hmm.

:

00:52:12,521 --> 00:52:14,366

As you just like walk by her, like Yeah.

:

00:52:14,366 --> 00:52:16,061

Or if you're like walking

down the street mm-hmm.

:

00:52:16,141 --> 00:52:18,701

Like you can just like,

kind of guide her mm-hmm.

:

00:52:18,781 --> 00:52:20,636

In the direction you're going

with the hand on the back.

:

00:52:20,636 --> 00:52:24,956

So just like those little ways

of, uh, showing that affection.

:

00:52:24,986 --> 00:52:25,076

Mm-hmm.

:

00:52:25,406 --> 00:52:27,056

Um, mostly in like a physical touch way.

:

00:52:27,236 --> 00:52:27,626

Yeah.

:

00:52:27,836 --> 00:52:32,366

But I think also like emotional intimacy

plays a part here in the sexual unity,

:

00:52:32,366 --> 00:52:36,236

because connecting on an emotional level

throughout the day is also going to

:

00:52:36,236 --> 00:52:38,726

just strengthen that sexual intimacy.

:

00:52:38,966 --> 00:52:44,426

Because if you are providing moments

where your spouse can share about

:

00:52:44,426 --> 00:52:47,846

what's going on in their inner world,

that connection is being formed,

:

00:52:48,086 --> 00:52:52,826

which builds trust and safety so that

then there's more freedom and trust.

:

00:52:53,396 --> 00:52:55,046

And total gift in sex.

:

00:52:55,051 --> 00:52:55,121

Yeah.

:

00:52:55,436 --> 00:52:55,766

Yeah.

:

00:52:55,916 --> 00:52:57,356

So it all relates.

:

00:52:57,356 --> 00:52:58,281

It all relates.

:

00:52:58,281 --> 00:52:59,521

All piece, A big puzzle piece.

:

00:52:59,521 --> 00:53:02,606

All these, all of these areas of

communion are very, very important.

:

00:53:02,606 --> 00:53:05,816

So to summarize the five, again,

it's spiritual unity, emotional

:

00:53:05,816 --> 00:53:09,416

intimacy, companionship,

teamwork, and sexual intimacy.

:

00:53:09,836 --> 00:53:10,676

They're all very important.

:

00:53:10,946 --> 00:53:11,276

Yeah.

:

00:53:11,516 --> 00:53:12,866

And each of them like.

:

00:53:13,091 --> 00:53:16,241

Feeds on the other and

builds upon the other.

:

00:53:16,241 --> 00:53:19,961

And when one improves the

rest improve and deepen.

:

00:53:20,241 --> 00:53:24,081

So some advice would be to just kind of

take all this content right back with

:

00:53:24,081 --> 00:53:28,671

your spouse and kind of reflect like maybe

one area, like what is one area that we

:

00:53:28,671 --> 00:53:32,301

feel like we're kind of lacking in and

kind of what can we do in the future?

:

00:53:32,301 --> 00:53:36,531

What plan can we kind of put into place

to work on our marriage to strengthen

:

00:53:36,531 --> 00:53:38,241

that area of our relationship?

:

00:53:38,241 --> 00:53:41,271

And then once one area is strengthened,

like the rest will deepen and then

:

00:53:41,271 --> 00:53:43,011

you can kind of work on one at a time.

:

00:53:43,191 --> 00:53:43,521

Yep.

:

00:53:43,571 --> 00:53:44,681

Yeah, I totally agree.

:

00:53:44,771 --> 00:53:50,531

Uh, I think the other thing too, is

like , marital life is, it's a daily

:

00:53:51,251 --> 00:53:53,261

activity, like, and it's ordinary.

:

00:53:53,261 --> 00:53:56,891

And so like one big grand gesture

is not gonna fix all your problems.

:

00:53:57,596 --> 00:54:01,046

Uh, but it's doing the little things.

:

00:54:01,076 --> 00:54:04,826

And building on those small habits

and doing it consistently and daily

:

00:54:04,826 --> 00:54:06,086

is gonna have a much bigger impact.

:

00:54:06,446 --> 00:54:08,666

Um, so I would just

encourage you all on that.

:

00:54:08,976 --> 00:54:10,176

But that's all we got for today.

:

00:54:10,226 --> 00:54:10,766

Um.

:

00:54:11,396 --> 00:54:13,076

Yeah, I really hope this was helpful.

:

00:54:13,376 --> 00:54:16,616

Shoot me a DM if you wanna

dive into any one of them more

:

00:54:16,616 --> 00:54:19,676

deeply, but really praying for

all you guys in your marriages.

:

00:54:19,826 --> 00:54:24,326

Thanks so much for just trusting us to

walk with you and, and guide you in it.

:

00:54:24,326 --> 00:54:27,086

And just a reminder, again,

like we're right there with you.

:

00:54:27,086 --> 00:54:28,466

We're learning alongside you.

:

00:54:28,526 --> 00:54:31,226

Um, we're just really passionate about

this, so we like, have resources to

:

00:54:31,226 --> 00:54:36,806

share, but, um, but we are not marriage

therapists or officials by any means.

:

00:54:36,806 --> 00:54:36,896

Nope.

:

00:54:36,956 --> 00:54:38,906

So if you're really struggling, like.

:

00:54:39,716 --> 00:54:41,786

Take, take that to a professional.

:

00:54:42,836 --> 00:54:47,726

Don't, don't just go off of

our advice, uh, after party.

:

00:54:47,906 --> 00:54:48,416

Yeah.

:

00:54:48,476 --> 00:54:51,446

Let's move on to the after party,

but well, before we go to the after

:

00:54:51,446 --> 00:54:53,186

party, we're gonna do ever be answers.

:

00:54:53,456 --> 00:54:58,556

So this is the part where we answer one

question on the show, and then the rest

:

00:54:58,556 --> 00:55:00,506

will be answered by us at the after party.

:

00:55:00,531 --> 00:55:00,821

Okay?

:

00:55:00,836 --> 00:55:03,926

But you've never done, ever be answered,

so you'll be, no, you'll be here too.

:

00:55:05,096 --> 00:55:06,296

Um, let's see.

:

00:55:06,296 --> 00:55:06,536

Okay.

:

00:55:06,536 --> 00:55:11,336

Okay, so our question today here is,

I've heard a lot about the chosen and how

:

00:55:11,336 --> 00:55:15,596

it helps people see scripture in a new

way, but I've not watched it myself yet.

:

00:55:15,796 --> 00:55:18,496

As a Catholic, I wanna be

mindful about what I take in.

:

00:55:18,676 --> 00:55:21,196

So from your perspective, do you

feel like the chosen aligns well

:

00:55:21,196 --> 00:55:22,786

with Catholic teaching and devotion?

:

00:55:22,996 --> 00:55:25,396

How do you encourage Catholics

to approach shows like this

:

00:55:25,396 --> 00:55:27,286

that portray the life of Jesus?

:

00:55:28,486 --> 00:55:29,236

Do you want me to go first?

:

00:55:29,236 --> 00:55:29,596

Sure.

:

00:55:30,106 --> 00:55:32,536

Uh, so the Chosen is great.

:

00:55:32,656 --> 00:55:33,466

We love, we love the Chosen.

:

00:55:33,466 --> 00:55:34,096

We love the Chosen.

:

00:55:34,126 --> 00:55:35,176

It's a great TV show.

:

00:55:35,566 --> 00:55:42,236

Um, it is not like:

:

00:55:42,636 --> 00:55:46,656

Biblically accurate, biblically accurate,

like it is inspired by scripture.

:

00:55:46,656 --> 00:55:46,746

Mm-hmm.

:

00:55:46,986 --> 00:55:48,906

And they take some creative liberties.

:

00:55:48,936 --> 00:55:49,026

Mm-hmm.

:

00:55:50,046 --> 00:55:51,606

And it is really spot on.

:

00:55:51,606 --> 00:55:51,666

Yeah.

:

00:55:51,666 --> 00:55:55,506

Like, there are like, and I know that

when they, I know the creators, um,

:

00:55:56,076 --> 00:56:01,206

it was like an ecumenical effort,

uh, that the creators of the chosen

:

00:56:01,536 --> 00:56:06,786

did to like make sure that, uh, it

was very ecumenical in the fact that

:

00:56:06,786 --> 00:56:09,246

like the Mormons, the Christian.

:

00:56:09,951 --> 00:56:16,071

Jews, the Catholics, like we could all,

there wasn't anything in the series that

:

00:56:16,071 --> 00:56:19,101

would be like completely antithetical

to their religion and so, yeah.

:

00:56:19,341 --> 00:56:24,141

Um, I actually heard one of the founders

of Angel Studios say that they had like

:

00:56:24,141 --> 00:56:26,901

a council of like Catholic bishops.

:

00:56:27,591 --> 00:56:31,161

Rabbis, Jewish rabbis, the whoever,

whatever they're called in the Mormon

:

00:56:31,161 --> 00:56:36,331

church, and some Christian, uh, like

Protestant pastors, like , there

:

00:56:36,331 --> 00:56:39,811

was like a committee and they would

take the script to that committee

:

00:56:40,321 --> 00:56:41,621

and say, is there anything in here?

:

00:56:42,106 --> 00:56:45,226

That is antithetical dear Faith, that

like you would not want to watch it.

:

00:56:45,226 --> 00:56:49,336

And they would then, like all of them

would then like highlight or cross out

:

00:56:49,336 --> 00:56:51,466

the things that they don't want and

they would go back to writing and they

:

00:56:51,466 --> 00:56:56,806

would just go back and forth until

they like landed on a version that, uh,

:

00:56:56,806 --> 00:56:58,006

was all agreed, was all agreed upon.

:

00:56:58,006 --> 00:57:00,706

So, so you can absolutely

watch it as a Catholic.

:

00:57:00,916 --> 00:57:04,216

Um, I, I have loved it

Martin and I have loved it.

:

00:57:04,546 --> 00:57:07,726

Uh, it's been a beautiful

depiction of the life of Christ.

:

00:57:07,786 --> 00:57:07,936

Yeah.

:

00:57:08,176 --> 00:57:09,286

Um, and we love it.

:

00:57:09,286 --> 00:57:11,806

I think the only thing with that is.

:

00:57:12,571 --> 00:57:16,376

Um, like understand that there

are creative liberties that are

:

00:57:16,376 --> 00:57:17,431

taken, liberties that are taken.

:

00:57:17,611 --> 00:57:21,331

Um, don't take it as like

complete church teaching, in fact.

:

00:57:21,421 --> 00:57:21,751

Yeah.

:

00:57:21,931 --> 00:57:25,621

But it's a great show and if you

have questions on it, look it up.

:

00:57:25,621 --> 00:57:25,891

Right?

:

00:57:25,891 --> 00:57:28,051

Like look up from a

Catholic perspective, like.

:

00:57:28,761 --> 00:57:33,321

What the approach is here, or if

this actually happened or not.

:

00:57:33,321 --> 00:57:36,591

You know, if you have doubts that you

feel like are actually impeding your

:

00:57:36,771 --> 00:57:38,391

faith or your relationship with God.

:

00:57:38,391 --> 00:57:41,661

But in my experience, I've, I

haven't experienced any of that.

:

00:57:41,661 --> 00:57:43,911

Like in my experience, it's

only strengthened my faith.

:

00:57:43,911 --> 00:57:47,211

It's only strengthened my

relationship with God and gave me.

:

00:57:47,836 --> 00:57:54,676

Um, a new way to engage with scripture

and a new way to understand Jesus.

:

00:57:54,676 --> 00:57:58,846

Obviously, Jonathan Rumi, who plays Jesus

like is doing the best that he can to

:

00:57:58,846 --> 00:58:04,156

portray the most important person who's

ever walked to this earth, the biggest

:

00:58:04,156 --> 00:58:08,806

historical figure who was literally not

just a, not a historical figure, but

:

00:58:08,806 --> 00:58:11,116

like our savior and Jesus Christ, right?

:

00:58:11,116 --> 00:58:12,946

So he does his absolute best.

:

00:58:13,681 --> 00:58:16,501

And sure there's parts of Jesus that

maybe aren't accurate or maybe we

:

00:58:16,501 --> 00:58:18,241

don't know, but none of us know.

:

00:58:18,511 --> 00:58:23,281

But he's portrayed in such a beautiful,

tender real way that I think it

:

00:58:23,281 --> 00:58:27,601

bridges the gap for a lot of people

who have hesitations about Jesus

:

00:58:27,601 --> 00:58:30,211

as a person, and it's helped me

in my relationship with him a ton.

:

00:58:30,211 --> 00:58:32,431

So I think it's great and safe to watch.

:

00:58:33,151 --> 00:58:34,831

All right, that's all we got for today.

:

00:58:34,931 --> 00:58:37,031

-:

we'll just move on to the after party.

:

00:58:37,041 --> 00:58:39,441

Where we'll answer these

last two questions.

:

00:58:39,441 --> 00:58:42,801

The questions we'll be answering are,

could you explain more about Seek, for

:

00:58:42,801 --> 00:58:46,671

those of us who have never attended, which

is so exciting, I love talking about Seek.

:

00:58:47,031 --> 00:58:50,271

And then what are some ways that you

and Trey prepared for marriage during

:

00:58:50,271 --> 00:58:54,681

your engagement season, especially

with the nuance, um, to long distance.

:

00:58:54,681 --> 00:58:57,471

So we'll be sharing those at

the after party for all those

:

00:58:57,471 --> 00:58:58,701

that are in our Kingdom Club.

:

00:58:59,156 --> 00:59:00,656

-:

And if you're not, come join.

:

00:59:00,746 --> 00:59:01,466

See you next week.

:

00:59:01,706 --> 00:59:01,946

Bye.

Next Episode All Episodes Previous Episode

Listen for free

Show artwork for Ever Be

About the Podcast

Ever Be
A faith and lifestyle podcast.
The Ever Be Podcast is a faith and lifestyle podcast filled with meaningful conversations and practical tips that will inspire and empower you to live a Christ centered life in todayā€™s modern world. Through her own experience of surrendering completely to God and finding true fullness of life, your host Mari Wagner, has committed to having Godā€™s praise ā€œever beā€ on her lips and sharing that message with the world. Listen in for insightful, real life conversations and actionable steps on how to claim the full life God created you for.

With over 100K followers and counting, Instagram content creator and founder of the popular Catholic lifestyle brand, West Coast Catholic, Mari Wagner is showing the world how to live a bold, attractive, and fulfilling Catholic life by being in the world but not of it. On the podcast youā€™ll get a combination of heartfelt solo episodes with Mari, interviews with exciting guests, and up-close and personal time with both the Wagnerā€™sā€”Mari and Trey. What more could you ask for?!

Finally! Answers to questions youā€™ve been asking like:
How do I infuse prayer into my daily life? How do I live out my Catholic faith? What is the best dating and marriage advice? What does a good Catholic marriage look like? How do I grow in homemaking skills and build a domestic church? How do I create a beautiful and welcoming home? What does a healthy and balanced lifestyle look like? Is it possible to find a solid community of like minded women?

Host Mari Wagner covers topics that you actually care about from faith life, to relationships and marriage, to homemaking, to healthy living. Each episode is crafted to resonate with your challenges and aspirations as a modern Christian woman seeking purpose, balance, and joy.

Tune into the Ever Be Podcast for valuable advice, relatable stories, expert insights and just some fun girl chats with someone who really gets you. Hit play to get out of the rut you constantly feel yourself in, and subscribe to join the community and experience the fullness of life Jesus has in store for you.

About your host

Profile picture for Mari Wagner

Mari Wagner